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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28180197">In for keeps</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/fifty_fifty/pseuds/fifty_fifty'>fifty_fifty</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Merlin (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Accents, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blow Jobs, Bottom Merlin (Merlin), Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Coming Out, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Exhaustion, Feelings Realization, Forehead Kisses, Foreplay, Hospitalization, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Masturbation, Modern Era, Modern Royalty, Prince Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Reunions, Royalty, Secret Relationship, Separations, Sex Toys, Top Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Top Arthur Pendragon/Bottom Merlin (Merlin), Webcam/Video Chat Sex, leon deserves a raise</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 20:48:01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>21,137</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28180197</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/fifty_fifty/pseuds/fifty_fifty</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin and Prince Arthur have been in a relationship for a while, unbeknownst to others. Arthur is ready to take the next step and make them official, but Merlin isn’t yet. The restrictions on his life and the mere idea of the lack of privacy seem too much for him to bear.</p><p>Separated over Christmas, overworked and overwrought, an accident befalls Arthur.</p><p>Cue a worried Merlin racing overnight on a trouble-ridden trip to Scotland on Christmas Eve. </p><p>Well, the course of true love, never did run smooth...</p><p>- - -</p><p>Aka, the Christmas modern royalty au <s>nobody</s> Aoigensou asked for.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>36</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>349</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Merlin Holidays 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>In for keeps</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/aoigensou/gifts">aoigensou</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Aoigensou, thank you for your wonderful prompts. I did attempt something along the lines of one of them. But it didn't seem to work out. Instead, this is what I managed to produce, based on a few of your likes. I hope that you enjoy it. x</p><p>Also a big thank you to the mods and my beta who have been so patient with me!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Merlin sighed and stirred his hot chocolate listlessly as he listened to his mum talking excitedly about Christmas and Calennig arrangements in the village this year. He wasn’t taking much of it in, but his mum hadn’t seemed to notice, and he didn’t want to dampen her spirits by telling her that he could care less that Mrs Jones was making her famous Wassail and how adorable Will’s little girl Cerys was, now that she was big enough to lisp her way through traditional Calennig songs. </p><p>It wasn’t like he didn’t enjoy being back home again and spending time with his mum. It was just… he missed Arthur. Much as he loathed to admit it. There was a time when he’d hated royalty with such a passion that he’d have laughed in your face if you told him he’d be in love with the Prince of Wales. People would still laugh in his face, probably, because no one knew save for a few of their uni friends and Arthur’s bodyguard, Leon.</p><p>He and Arthur had been talking a lot lately about what the future might hold for them. Arthur wanted to move forward with their relationship and widen their circle of people who knew about their relationship. But the more people who knew, the more likely it was that their cover would be blown, and Merlin wasn’t sure that he was ready to face that yet. He wasn’t even sure if it was what he wanted. Sure, being with Arthur was great. But he came with so much baggage that the idea of coming out to the world at large was, quite frankly, daunting.</p><p>“Are you sure you’re okay, cariad?” his mum asked, ruffling his hair. “You seem a bit sad. Bad break up?”</p><p>Merlin’s head shot up. “What?” </p><p>“You just seem a bit… heart-broken. You know that you can tell me anything, sweetheart. Especially if you’re having boy trouble.”</p><p>Merlin huffed a laugh. His mum was so supportive, to the point of being smothering at times.</p><p>“It’s fine. I’m sure it’ll work itself out. Now, do you need some help with dinner?”</p><p>Hunith smiled beguilingly at him. “I could do with some help with the potatoes. And if you want, you can tell me all about him.”</p><p>“Mum!” Merlin protested as he grabbed a peeler.</p><p>“Okay, okay. Or not. I’m only your mother; I just want to know if I should be expecting to buy a hat anytime soon.”</p><p>- - -</p><p>Merlin sat back on his childhood bed, propped up with pillows against the headboard. It was strange to be back home again on his own. Even though he had spent every Christmas in this small, cosy cottage in the same way, with the same traditions, it felt different this year. He felt as though he was missing an arm or a leg. It just didn’t feel right. He knew that things had to be this way, and that it was mostly his own fault that they were. But that didn’t make him feel any better about it.</p><p>He glanced over at his phone on the nightstand to check the time. He was waiting for Arthur to call. They’d arranged a video chat this evening, and Merlin was looking forward to hearing Arthur’s posh, plummy voice and seeing his princely face. For all that he had disliked Arthur at their first encounter, Merlin had to admit, he had always looked the part of a prince. Merlin genuinely believed he was destined for it. He was half convinced Arthur would still have been destined for it even if he’d been born in Hackney, rather than Westminster.</p><p>The phone rang, making Merlin jump. He hastened to grab it and answered the incoming call from one ‘Arthur Pratdragon’.</p><p>“Hey,” he breathed, a smile stretching wide on his face.</p><p>“Merlin,” said Arthur, who was smiling back at him with a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. Merlin recognised it at his ‘official’ smile. As he inspected Arthur’s face on his screen, his heart broke a little at how tired the prince looked, and he longed to smooth back the hair from his forehead and place a kiss of comfort there.</p><p>He pushed his concern down, knowing that Arthur wouldn’t tolerate being mollycoddled from such a distance.</p><p>“How are you doing?” he asked, hoping that that might give him an opening to express his sympathy.</p><p>Arthur blew out a breath and ran a hand through his hair, leaving it sticking up in places in an adorable way. It was a mannerism that Merlin recognised well from exam week at university. Just as he suspected; Arthur was stressed.</p><p>“I’m okay,” lied Arthur.</p><p>Merlin raised an eyebrow at him.</p><p>Arthur scowled. “It’s just busy. And Father and Morgana are fighting again, like usual. I guess I got used to a slower pace of life, and now it’s all catching up with me.</p><p>“At least it will be Christmas soon.”</p><p>“Another day for Morgana and Father to squabble and I get to pretend to be interested in Father’s speech again this year, joy.”</p><p>“I’ll have you know, my mother loves your father’s speeches. She makes me stand up and everything.”</p><p>Arthur laughed heartily. “Oh dear, I can just imagine it. Staunch republican Merlin Emrys being forced to show respect for the King by his patriotic, royal-loving mother.”</p><p>“Well, you know me,” laughed Merlin. “I only kneel for one king...”</p><p>“Merlin, you know it’s treason to refer to me as king when my father’s still on the throne.”</p><p>Merlin rolled his eyes. “You’re no fun.”</p><p>“Yes, well, if you’d been through everything that I had today you’d be no fun, either. What have you been up to? What’s new in Ealdor?”</p><p>“Honestly, Arthur. It’s the most boring place. The same things happen every year like clockwork, and heaven forbid anyone does anything a bit different. I think Mr Simmonds has had the same lights out on his apple tree since the year I was born! Or what’s left of it, at least. The latest exciting news is that the village council has voted to replace the roof of the village hall, and Will and Freya’s little girl lost her first tooth. All riveting stuff.”</p><p>“It’s exciting to me. And I know you love it there really. You wouldn’t shut up about how nice Welsh Christmasses were back before uni broke up for Christmas.”</p><p>“Well, that’s because I wanted you to come home with me, clotpole. I was trying to entice you.”</p><p>“If you were trying to entice me, you needn’t use your village, Merlin. I can think of much better ways.”</p><p>“I thought you were too tired for that sort of thing?”</p><p>“I wouldn’t be if we were together.”</p><p>Merlin sighed. “I know. And I know what you’re going to say, that I could have come with you to Scotland. But I couldn’t. Not yet. You have to admit, Arthur. You—your life—is quite the package deal. I don’t know if— I’m not sure if that’s something I can take on all the way.”</p><p>A frown marred Arthur’s face before he smoothed it away with his ‘official’ smile. “I understand.”</p><p>Merlin decided a change in tone was in order, to steer them away from dangerous territory. It had led to more than one argument between them before.</p><p>“Besides, we don’t have to be together-together for me to entice you...” </p><p>He let his eyes flick down towards his crotch. It had been more than a week since they’d been together, the longest they’d been apart since the summer. Back then, they’d made masturbating together a regular thing, and Merlin wondered if they might be able to reinstate it over the Christmas holidays. He loved being able to watch the way Arthur fell apart and let himself go, relieving himself of the responsibilities of his title even for a short while.</p><p>“Merlin…”</p><p>Merlin shifted a little, making himself more comfortable. </p><p>“I know what you’re doing,” Arthur said sternly. “And you better let me watch.”</p><p>With a grin, Merlin propped his phone against a pile of books on his nightstand, then reached to push his pajama bottoms down and off, leaving him naked from the waist down. He grabbed the phone again, arranging it against a pillow between his legs and settled down again. </p><p>He gave himself a few firm, confident strokes to coax himself from semi-hard to fully erect and smiled at the way Arthur was watching him intently. He loved doing this for and with Arthur. He had been a little bit self-conscious and shy the first time they’d done it; there had never been a long-distance aspect to any of his relationships before Arthur. But he had soon shed his inhibitions, and fully embraced how much it turned him on to be watched. </p><p>His cock gave a visible throb and he gave himself a gentle squeeze, wanting this to last more than a few moments. The pay off would be even greater if he held off, even if he knew he could get himself off very quickly in his current condition.</p><p>“What do you want me to do?” he asked with false coyness, trailing the free fingers of his other hand between his legs to cup and roll his balls. He let his fingers drift along his taint and traced a finger around his hole, questioning. “Maybe I should use a toy for you.”</p><p>“Fuck, yeah,” whispered Arthur.</p><p>“I bet you wish you could be here to use it on me though, huh?” Merlin asked, as he leaned over and reached into his nightstand to retrieve a tube of lube. </p><p>He surveyed the contents and contemplated which toy he wanted to have fun with tonight. After a moment of indecision, he took out a red dildo and set it down on the bed next to him. </p><p>“Of course I do,” said Arthur, his voice still quiet and tight.</p><p>Merlin settled himself again, partly propped up against his headboard. He clicked open the lube and squeezed some into his hand before discarding it. He coated his cock liberally, closing his eyes and enjoying the slick slide of his hand on his skin. He would never get tired of masturbating. Never. And he was glad that Arthur liked watching him so much. </p><p> Merlin had had to coax him into doing this at first, as a part of Arthur had been too stiff and proper to let go of his inhibitions easily. He had been horrified by the suggestion, which Merlin supposed he could understand; Arthur had so much more to lose than he did if it got out. But once Merlin started sending him downright explicit picture messages, Arthur’s resolve soon broke.</p><p>He moved his slick hand further down between his legs, back to his tight hole. He hadn’t used a toy in a while, as he’d been rooming with Arthur at university, but he’d been contemplating using one for a bit of personal pleasure this week, even if Arthur hadn’t been up for their usual games.</p><p>Arthur was difficult to read right now. He was still smarting a bit from Merlin’s refusal to go to Balmoral with him for Christmas, and Merlin wasn’t sure exactly where things stood between them. Arthur was also busy, and Merlin was sure he felt obligated to act the part of a perfect prince when he was under the same roof as his father. He could only imagine the scandal it would cause if the little picture collection they’d been building up ever got leaked to the press. To protect Arthur's privacy, Merlin regularly saved Arthur’s own pictures to his computer harddrive and then deleted the originals from his phone, but he held no such worries about his own pictures getting out. It wasn’t like he was particularly embarrassed about his own appearance. He’d never be as beautiful as Arthur, but he wasn’t that bad to look at. Arthur certainly seemed to appreciate him, and that was enough for Merlin.</p><p> He pushed a finger into his hole, taking his time with it, having no need to hurry. He’d locked the door and was feeling calm and relaxed. </p><p>Arthur sucked in a breath. “Jesus.”</p><p>Merlin pumped his finger in and out, before pressing a second in with the first. He crooked his fingers and his body jolted as they brushed against his prostate. He closed his eyes, enjoying the sensation as he did it a few more times, until it became too much to bear. He removed his fingers and reached for the dildo. He brought it up to his mouth and flicked his tongue out to lick the tip before drawing it closer and wrapping his lips around the head as he gave it a suck. He pouted a little at the rubbery feel and taste of the toy. It was a poor substitute for the real thing, but it was better than nothing, and this part was all for show anyhow. He slid the dildo shallowly in and out of his mouth, working his way up to take more and more of it as he relaxed his throat, until he reached his limit. </p><p>Arthur let out a moan. “God, Merlin. Your <i>mouth</i>.” </p><p>Merlin looked up at him, pleased to see that he had similarly relocated to a bed and had his cock his hand. Merlin stared him in the eye as he slowly pulled the dildo from his lips. He grabbed the lube and drizzled it over and along the length of the toy.</p><p>He pumped a hand along the slickened length before positioning it between his legs and, keeping eye contact with Arthur, gently pressing it against his hole. He hissed a little at the stretch, pushing bit by bit until the head of the dildo breached the tight muscle there. </p><p>“Fuck,” Merlin gasped. He’d forgotten how big this toy was, and how unprepared he’d been for it. He took a moment to let himself adjust, then started to move it again experimentally.</p><p>“Yeah, look at you taking that cock,” breathed Arthur. “Show me how well you can take it.” </p><p>Merlin increased his pace, the lube making it easy to pump the dildo back and forth as he found a good rhythm that was building, building and setting him alight.</p><p>“That’s right, show me how much you love it. Can’t wait to have you with me again and riding my cock.”</p><p>Arthur’s voice, his words, and the toy, were rapidly bringing Merlin to the edge. He wrapped the fingers of his free hand around his cock, smearing the leaking precum along his length on the down stroke.</p><p>“Fuck. Arthur,” he groaned. “Fuck you and your voice. I’m so close…”</p><p>“When you’re ready, I’m going to bring you on all my trips as my royal bedwarmer.”</p><p>“What an honour,” he bit out, and his limbs quivered from holding back on coming, wanting to make it last just that little bit longer.</p><p>“Everyone would know just what you did and how your most important duty was to keep my cock warm at all times.”</p><p>A shudder ran up Merlin’s spine, and heat pooled in his groin as he rapidly tugged on his cock. “God, I—”</p><p>Merlin came with a small cry, cum spilling on his hand and shirt. He lay back, trying to catch his breath as he watched Arthur stroking himself just a few more times before his face went slack and he came with a grunt. He was always so damned polite and repressed when he came; Merlin swore one day he’d make Arthur scream. </p><p>- - -</p><p>Arthur woke to the dull light of morning streaming in through a bedroom window. He reached out instinctively, and found himself disappointed that the space next to him was empty. He’d been having a wonderful dream about exploring the estate with Merlin in tow. It was an extra slap in the face having then woken up without him.</p><p>He had another busy day today. George had reeled off his schedule to him last night before he’d left for the evening, but Arthur hadn’t really been listening. He was his father’s pawn, as usual, and therefore it didn’t matter what was planned; he would have to do it regardless. And it wasn’t as though he hadn’t been well-trained for it. He’d been taught to wave for the cameras since before he could talk. Country, duty and appearance was to come before everything else. All that he did, his father measured against this metric. He was surprised that his father had allowed him to go to St Andrews for university rather than Cambridge, as was traditional. But he was glad that Uther had permitted it, otherwise he’d never have met Merlin. </p><p>They’d both been taking a literature class for the semester. Merlin had been the one person in the entire lecture who had blanked him, only ever acknowledging his presence with disdain. Their professor, Mr Gharrah, had assigned them as partners for a piece of coursework on George Orwell, which had forced them to share space and time together. It had given Arthur the perfect opportunity to have it out with Merlin and prove whatever misunderstandings Merlin had about him to be false.</p><p>He hadn’t really understood what made him so determined to prove Merlin wrong. He’d experienced plenty of people who had thumbed their noses at him and made assumptions based on what they knew about him from the press, and they didn’t bother him. But Merlin not liking him <i>had</i> bothered him. </p><p>He’d thought at the time that part of the reason was that, if he hadn’t been a prince, he’d believed that he and Merlin could have been good friends. He was wrong. They had turned out to be so much more than friends. Once Arthur had got Merlin to look beyond the image he’d built up in his head, Arthur had found himself slowly falling in love. They had fast become best friends, despite all their differences in station, and both of them relished teasing each other mercilessly. Arthur could give as good as he got when it came to Merlin, loving to play up the caricature of a spoilt prince.</p><p>He sighed as he rolled onto his back. George would be here soon, no doubt, to wake him and ready him for breakfast and whatever other ghastly engagements he had today. He wanted Merlin here by his side so badly. Morgana was almost completely settled down these days with the ever incorrigible Gwaine, Earl of Orkney. The two of them had been circling each other for years before finally giving in and taking a chance. They’d had more than their fair share of fights since their engagement, but that was always going to happen with two temperamental people. They had decided on a long engagement for this very reason. Father was afraid that they might break up and cause a scandal if they married too early, and that suited Morgana and Gwaine perfectly. Neither of them was ready to marry, but both were happy to have the excuse to spend so much time together. Arthur wished he had such an excuse to spend the Christmas season with Merlin.</p><p>A part of him was certain that he could win Merlin over, and convince him that he was worth the harassment and privacy violations Merlin would experience if he were to become Arthur’s husband, because to not have him there was unthinkable. But at times like this, when the world was suspended between night and day, or in the darkest hours of the night, a cold fear would strike his heart as he imagined Merlin might decide he wasn’t worth it. </p><p>Arthur reached out for his phone, his finger hovering over the call button for a moment before he tossed it aside. No. He wouldn’t call Merlin at this ungodly hour, no matter how desperate he was to hear his voice. Merlin would be cranky anyway. He loved his sleep and there was no way in hell he’d be happy to hear from Arthur at… five fifty-six in the morning. He wouldn’t even have a way to make it up to him. No, it wouldn’t do. He needed to push this nonsense aside, push it deep down in that compartment of his brain, the place where he kept all of those things he couldn’t do anything about, and prepare to meet with his father for breakfast. </p><p>He let out a tired groan and threw his legs over the side of the bed, hauling himself upright. He’d have a shower and then change, and after that it would be breakfast and he’d feel much better about the world.</p><p>- - -</p><p>As he entered the dining hall — far too huge and grand for everyday use, in Arthur’s opinion — his father rose from his chair and gave Arthur a quick hug.</p><p>“Ah, Arthur. Good morning.”</p><p>“Good morning, Father,” replied Arthur, a little confused by his father’s high spirits as he reached for a glass of orange juice.</p><p>He glanced across the table and noted the untouched places set for Morgana and Gwaine. He bet they didn’t get such early wake up calls as he did.</p><p>“How are you?” Arthur continued. “You seem very bright this morning.”</p><p>“I am feeling very well,” Uther agreed. “Are you looking forward to our trip today?”</p><p>“Trip?” asked Arthur, suddenly feeling anxious and wishing he’d actually listened to what George was droning on about the night before so that he could be prepared for his father’s scrutiny.</p><p>“Yes. Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten, Arthur. Our annual fishing trip.”</p><p>“A fishing trip? Now? In December? Are you mad?” said Arthur, immediately regretting that he hadn’t filtered his words as he usually would. His relationship with Merlin was really messing with his ability to be restrained. Merlin never held back on anything he wanted to say, and Arthur had picked up the same habit, with rather dangerous consequences.</p><p>His father scowled fiercely at him. “Don’t be so soft, Arthur. Wear a few layers and you’ll be fine. When have we ever let the weather decide what we do?”</p><p>It was on the tip of his tongue to remind his father of the hurried rearrangements of his Silver Jubilee celebrations two years ago, when the forecast a week before predicted it would rain the entire week. Outdoor events and festivals were switched to indoor ones, and marquees and covered walkways were erected to make the arrangements possible where they could not. Arthur had vivid memories of standing in the cold, pouring rain with an umbrella for well over an hour watching a flotilla in the king’s honour.</p><p>“We shall head out to the lake. I’ve had William prepare the boat for us and Mary has prepared a luncheon for us to take.”</p><p>“Sounds like you’ve got it all planned out,” said Arthur faintly, as he realised he was staring down the barrel of an entire day under the laser-sharp gaze of his father. He wondered if he would be strong enough to keep up his façade and keep his father at bay. </p><p>Uther nodded. “Of course I have, Arthur. You should take a page out of my book. A man should always have a plan about where he wishes to go—”</p><p>“—and how he intends to get there,” finished Arthur, all too familiar with this refrain.</p><p>“Indeed. Like what you wish to do after university.”</p><p>Arthur raised his eyebrows and very nearly spoke his mind, biting back a retort that he wasn’t aware that he had a choice in the matter — Merlin’s influence again.</p><p>Instead, he replied dutifully, “Yes, Father.”</p><p>At that point, Arthur was saved from further conversation as the household staff arrived to serve breakfast, and shortly thereafter Morgana and Gwaine emerged to join them and Arthur was left in peace to his own thoughts.</p><p>- - -</p><p>“Going on a Fishing Trip. Save me!” Arthur texted Merlin once he was safely back in his room.</p><p>“Why are you even up? It’s early. And why would anyone go on a fishing trip in December?” Merlin replied, followed by a selfie of himself looking sleepy and disheveled from his bed.</p><p>Arthur smiled that Merlin had had the same indignant response and then let out a deep sigh as he stared at the picture, longing to be able to reach out and touch his boyfriend.</p><p>“Fishing Trip is code for spending an entire day being interrogated and berated by Father,” Arthur messaged back glumly. </p><p>“Makes me feel glad I don’t have a father,” Merlin replied.</p><p>Arthur kicked himself. He should have been more considerate in his reply. He knew that Merlin was sensitive about not having known his father, despite what he said and how he acted when fathers were mentioned. Arthur had a similar sensitive spot when it came to his mother, though he had never disguised that. So far, people had never prodded at it, not even the press, for which he was thankful. It was helped by the fact that his mother, Queen Ygraine, had been much loved by the public for her charitable work and cheerful disposition. When she died and his father mourned, the country mourned with him.</p><p>Arthur felt the same aura of sympathy towards him even now that he was a grown adult, though his father had tarnished some of his goodwill when it came out that Morgana was his daughter via an affair and thus actually three months older than Arthur. Though Uther had legitimised her and given her the title of princess, Arthur was still considered the next in line for the throne. Morgana had told him he was welcome to it, as far as she was concerned. For his own part, Arthur was happy to have her and intended on naming Morgana and her children as his own heirs when the time came. He was hardly likely to have his own children, after all.</p><p>Impulsively, Arthur called Merlin. He was awake after all.</p><p>“Hello,” yawned Merlin.</p><p>“Thought it might be easier this way,” said Arthur as an explanation, when secretly, he just wanted to hear Merlin’s voice right now. “So, what are you going to be doing today?</p><p>Arthur could hear Merlin stretch and sigh. “I’m not sure. I think Mum said something about making mince pies and going for a walk. Then we’ll probably settle in for the evening with some Wassil and shit TV.”</p><p>“Sounds nice,” said Arthur, as he realised that it actually did. He could picture himself curled up on a sofa in front of a roaring wood fire with Merlin, making fun of whatever was on the television, and the idea was so warming and cheering, that he couldn’t help but smile.</p><p>“I miss you,” said Merlin.</p><p>“I miss you, too,” admitted Arthur. “I can’t wait for this all to be over so that we can be together again.”</p><p>There was a long pause on the phone, and Arthur wondered if he’d put his foot in it again. He didn’t mean to pressure Merlin. He just genuinely was not looking forward to the remaining ten days they were going to be apart.</p><p>“I’d better go before George comes knocking for me,” said Arthur, eyeing up the warm clothing the royal assistant had set out for him.</p><p>“‘Course,” said Merlin through another yawn. “Try not to worry about today too much. Yes, you’ll have to deal with your father, but that’s a drop in the ocean compared to the rest of your life.”</p><p>“True.” Arthur stretched himself and his eyes flicked to the door as sharp knocking sounded. “I have to go.”</p><p>“Okay, have fun,” said Merlin. “I’ll be thinking of you. From the warmth of my bed.”</p><p>“Merlin!”</p><p>Merlin laughed down the phone at him. “Made you think of something else for a moment, didn’t I? Seriously, it’ll be okay.”</p><p>“Prince Arthur, sir!” called George through the door. “Are you dressed?”</p><p>Arthur sighed. “Now I really have to go. If you don’t hear from me, my father killed me and I love you. Have a good day, Merlin.”</p><p>“Love you too, Arthur. Bye!”</p><p>- - -</p><p>Arthur sat back after casting his line, feeling apprehensive. He hated these trips. There was literally no way of escaping his father’s scrutiny when they were sitting in a boat together in the middle of a lake. Even though it was the middle of winter, Arthur eyed the water contemplatively. Maybe he could fall in? Then he wouldn’t have to be subject to any interrogation. He’d likely get hypothermia, but wouldn’t that be a worthwhile compromise?</p><p>“So, Arthur,” began his father. “How are your studies going?”</p><p>“Fine,” replied Arthur automatically, only to be met by a sharp look from his father. “I’m passing all my courses.”</p><p>“As well you should. I didn’t send you to Eton only for you to flop miserably amongst public school children. I would hope that you are doing very well and are at the top of your classes.”</p><p>Arthur paused. He had been doing well. He’d kept his head down and got the work done and then some, determined not to give his father anything to berate him over. The press would undoubtedly make a story out of him performing poorly at school, making him out to be thick, or having brought his way in with money and influence. But then Merlin happened, and Arthur realised that he didn’t care about doing well. There were more important things than trying to please an unpleasable father, such as pleasing himself. </p><p>“I’m working as hard as I can,” said Arthur, half-truthfully. He was working as hard as his relationship with Merlin permitted.</p><p>In truth, spending time with Merlin had taken the place of late nights of study and careful weeks of planning and researching for his papers. Instead, they were hastily written deals with more than a few all-nighters pulled. But his father didn’t need to know that. Arthur felt like he was finally getting the authentic student experience he’d envisioned when he’d chosen St Andrews over an Oxbridge college. St Andrews was also conveniently further away from London—and his father.</p><p>“What are you intending to do after university, son?” his father asked.</p><p>Arthur was startled for a moment. He wasn’t aware that he had much, if any choice in the matter. What was his father saying? He couldn’t possibly mean what Arthur thought he meant, could he? It was well-known that, as an heir to the throne, he would be expected to do some kind of military service, although Arthur hadn’t decided yet which branch of the military he wanted to join. </p><p>He was torn between the army and the RAF, though in the end, it wouldn’t make a whole lot of difference. He wouldn’t be allowed to do anything that was actually dangerous. Perhaps, given that, it might be more useful to join the air force. At least then he’d come away from it with the ability to fly some kind of aircraft, and he’d be able to do something that would help to make a difference. In the army, he’d be kept away from any chance of conflict; there would be no possibility of going to a warzone to assist or fight there. Not that Arthur <i>wanted</i> to fight in a war. And he wanted even less now than he had before he’d started university.</p><p>His father was bluffing of course; he had to be. Arthur had learned to spot when and where he had the opportunity to make a choice. His future career was not one of those opportunities.</p><p>His personal life, however… Well, for Arthur it wasn’t a choice. He was attracted to whom he was attracted to. He couldn’t change that. He could attempt to fake it and make himself and whichever woman he’d entrapped into marriage miserable, but the very thought was so awful that it also was not a choice to him. In the case of Merlin, it was his father who was going to have to make the choice. Not Arthur.</p><p>“I thought I might join the air force,” he replied.</p><p>His father nodded in approval. “Very good.”</p><p>Silence then reigned as Arthur huddled into his layers of clothing. The thermals, wool, and fleece retained his body heat, but did nothing for the stinging cold as the wind whipped against his face.</p><p>“Are you making many friends?” his father asked, breaking the peace that had settled over the bleak lake. “Of the right sort, of course. I discovered the hard way that you have to be careful of those who befriend you when you are in a position such as ours. You must be able to trust those who you call your friend.”</p><p>“Yes, Father. I know to be careful.”</p><p>“Good. And dare I ask if you might have found the future Princess of Wales? One should always be on the lookout for a suitable wife when one’s options are limited. Remember, Arthur. Whichever young lady you choose, she must be a respectful, responsible one. You will need to choose a woman who can help you to shoulder the burdens that you carry.”</p><p>Arthur smiled to himself, trying to imagine Merlin fitting into any of those categories, bar the supportive one. He took a deep breath. He’d been waiting for the opportunity to present itself whereby he could break the news to his father that there would never be a Princess of Wales. This was as good a moment as any.</p><p>“Actually, Father...” he began. </p><p>Uther made a delighted noise. “You’ve found someone? That’s very good news, Arthur. You must tell me all about her. Is she suitable? How long have you been courting her? Do you see a future with this woman?”</p><p>Arthur held up his hand to his father, trying to stop the flood of questions.</p><p>“At least tell me which family she’s from.”</p><p>“Well, about that.... I’m afraid that they’re not from any family at all. At least, not in that sense.”</p><p>Uther rubbed his chin. “A commoner, hmm? I was worried about this. It wouldn’t have happened, of course, if you’d taken my advice and applied to Cambridge. You would have met many like-minded people there.”</p><p>Arthur bristled. Yes, Merlin might be a commoner, and he was most definitely not what his father would call suitable, given that he was poor, outspoken, stubborn… He was a republican for God’s sake, rather than a monarchist! And he certainly wasn’t a woman.<br/>
But he fit with Arthur. He made Arthur’s life complete.</p><p>With Merlin in his life, Arthur felt a happiness that he’d never imagined would be possible for himself. He wanted to keep that happiness—he <i>needed</i> to keep that happiness. And whilst he couldn’t do anything but have faith that Merlin would decide he was worth being with, he could at least lay down the groundwork for their relationship when it came to his father, and hope that, somehow, acceptance would be forthcoming.  </p><p>“That doesn’t matter to me,” said Arthur honestly. “Who they are is what matters to me.”</p><p>He noticed a tug on his fishing rod and started to reel it in. It proved to be rather a strong fish, so Arthur stood up as he carefully started to wind in the line for greater leverage.</p><p>“Well, then, who exactly is she, Arthur?”</p><p>Arthur swallowed the lump in his throat and closed his eyes as he took a deep breath. It was now or never. “For starters, he’s not a she. I’m gay, Father.”</p><p>Arthur didn’t get to hear his father’s response, as the fish he’d caught chose that moment to give his line a sharp tug. It startled Arthur enough that he slipped on the wet boards of the boat, tipping off-balance just enough that he went tumbling into the water, head first.</p><p>- - -</p><p>Merlin was pouting. He was curled up in a blanket on the sofa in front of the roaring fire, his mother watching some kind of police drama on the TV, but he hadn’t really been paying attention.</p><p>He knew he was being silly. Arthur had told him that he might go days without getting in touch. But he still felt entitled to be upset. He hadn’t heard from Arthur in almost two days now, and he missed him. He worried about how Arthur’s fishing trip with his father had gone. Maybe that was why Arthur hadn’t been in touch. Maybe he had been forbidden from calling, for some reason. He <i>had</i> made that joke at the end of their last call… Though Merlin didn’t think the King of England was in the habit of committing filicide.</p><p>“What’s up, cariad?” his mum asked, putting down the blanket she was knitting. “You’ve been moping around all day.”</p><p>“Have not,” said Merlin, sticking his lip out.</p><p>His mother gave him a look and Merlin rolled his eyes, aware that he was being childish.</p><p>“Is it a boy?” Hunith asked, picking up her knitting again. </p><p>“What?” said Merlin, startling from his bad mood. “Who said it was a boy?”</p><p>“No one,” she said, as she started busying herself with counting stitches. “But I know that look, and you’ve been checking your phone constantly. Did you meet someone?”</p><p>Merlin sighed and pulled the blanket tighter around himself. It was his favourite. “Yeah, you could say that.”</p><p>“And he doesn’t feel the same way?” </p><p>“No. It’s not that. It’s… complicated. We decided to spend Christmas apart. And, well…”</p><p>“You might be regretting it?” </p><p>“Of course not. You know I like coming home for Christmas.”</p><p>Hunith laughed softly. “You’re very sweet, Merlin. But you’ve been bored stiff most of the time that you’ve been here. Now I know why. <i>My boy is in love.</i>”</p><p>“Mum!” he whined, annoyed at her habit at zeroing in on the truth.</p><p>He was thankful when the programme ended and the news started, as his mother’s attention returned to the TV.</p><p><i>‘This is Tom Bradby with the ITV News at Ten. And our headlines tonight… With Brexit a mere ten days away, people are asking: how likely is it that a deal will be struck? Labour leader Keir Starmer calls for England’s school curriculum to be more diverse, and the Prince of Wales hospitalised with pneumonia. Join us after </i>The Big Quiz<i> for the latest.’</i></p><p>Merlin sat bolt upright, his heart pounding out of his chest, and his breath taken from him momentarily.</p><p>“Is everything okay, cariad? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”</p><p>“I… I need to make a phone call,” he said faintly, easing himself up onto his rather unstable legs. He bolted out of the room and up into his bedroom. As he closed the door behind him, Merlin sunk to the floor and let out a shaky sigh that threatened to be a sob. <i>Hospital</i>. <i>Pneumonia</i>. Neither of those things were good. </p><p>He pulled his phone from his pocket and with shaking hands and opened his contact lists. He called Arthur’s number, holding the phone to his ear.</p><p>“Come on, come on,” he murmured, pleading for someone, anyone, to pick up so that he could find out how Arthur was.</p><p>After several rings, the call diverted to Arthur’s voicemail. It wasn’t even customised, so that Merlin could hear his voice. Oh, how he longed to hear Arthur’s voice. </p><p>He hung up and instead opened a browser on his phone to see if he could find some more news online. He typed Prince of Wales into his phone and picked out the first reliable news source about Arthur, his heart in his throat. He skimmed the article, scanning for useful information about how Arthur was and how he was doing. Was he okay? How bad was his condition? How long had he been sick? Was he going to die? Oh, God. What if he died up there in Scotland, all alone?</p><p>The news was apparently too recent for there to be much written about it. The articles that he did see basically told him all the same information. Arthur had been taken to hospital yesterday afternoon. No official statement had been released.</p><p>He tried calling again. Voicemail, again. Merlin threw his phone across the room in frustration and a spark of magic followed it. He pulled his knees into his chest and rested his forehead on them, taking several long deep breaths, trying to get his feelings and emotions under control. Nothing good ever came of panicking and losing control of himself like this.</p><p>He focused on breathing in through his nose and out through his mouth like his meditation app had taught him, allowing the helplessness to wash over him before letting it go. Arthur needed him to be strong, and right now that meant calming himself down and pulling himself together.</p><p>After many long minutes, Merlin opened his eyes and hauled himself up off of the floor. No longer panicked, but still with a deep-seated feeling of dread in his stomach, he flopped down onto his bed. Even his magic had dulled to a faded slow, humming awareness in the back of his head, rather than the fizzled, panicked itching he’d been experiencing before.</p><p>Merlin wished he had a way to find out exactly how Arthur was doing, but the only person he had the contact details for was Arthur. If only he had Leon’s number. Leon would know, wouldn’t he? Unless he’d been given Christmas off. He glanced over at where his phone lay against the wall and used his magic to summon it to him, automatically checking his notifications in case he’d somehow missed a message.</p><p>There was a knock at the door, and it opened slowly.</p><p>“Are you okay, cariad?” his mum asked, poking her head around the door. “I made you a tea.”</p><p>She came into the room and placed the cup down on his nightstand before perching on the edge of his bed. She looked down at him with her tender, loving eyes, and reached out with her hand to run her fingers through his hair.</p><p>Merlin closed his eyes and allowed this old gesture of love and comfort to soothe him. </p><p>“You don’t have to tell me anything, but I hope you know that I’ll always be here for you,” she said, pressing a kiss to his forehead. </p><p>Merlin sighed, suddenly overcome by the emotions of the day. If he couldn’t find out how Arthur was doing, he might as well sleep through some of it if he could. Hopefully, tomorrow would bring better news.</p><p>The last thing he remembered was his mother squeezing his hand.</p><p>- - -</p><p>Arthur shifted a little as he started to wake. He tried to push with his arms, becoming aware that he was being restrained in some way. After shifting a little, he managed to free them from the bedsheets and pulled at the mask on his face.</p><p>“Hey, hey,” said a voice. “Don’t do that.” </p><p>The person batted his hands away and adjusted the mask. </p><p>Arthur forced his eyes open, blinking a few times until he was finally able to focus, and a man with red, curly hair came into view.</p><p>“Leon?” he croaked, before realising that his throat was sore, his mouth dry. It hurt to breathe.</p><p>“Glad to see you awake, Your Highness. How are you feeling?” Leon asked kindly.</p><p>“Terrible,” replied Arthur, too tired to be anything other than honest. “What happened?”</p><p>Leon scowled at him. “You don’t remember?”</p><p>Arthur tried to push himself up to a sitting position, but gave up, not having the strength to do so.</p><p>“Rest, sir. Save your energy. You fell in the lake when you went fishing with your father. He tried to help you back into the boat, but you were in shock and he was unable to lift you by himself. You were in the water for some time before others were able to assist in getting you out. I’m not going to lie, sir. For a while, it was touch and go.”</p><p>Arthur tried to swallow, and it turned into a cough. In an instant, Leon helped remove his mask and offered him a drink from a straw cup. Arthur drank eagerly, savouring the sensation. </p><p>Leon took the drink away before he’d drunk his fill.</p><p>“Hey—”</p><p>“Sorry, they told me little and often. At least for now.”</p><p>Arthur looked around the room. He hadn’t been admitted to a hospital before; he’d always been treated at home when he was ill as a child. A doctor had even come and given him stitches once when he’d fallen from a tree and cut his head—Arthur remembered that vividly. He had, however, toured a lot of hospitals in his time, especially since he had turned eighteen, and as the patron of several children’s charities.</p><p>This room was rather luxurious for a hospital room, nothing like the ones he usually saw on tours and far cry from the time he’d gone with Merlin to the local Accident and Emergency. There were actual curtains at the window and comfortable armchairs. No cubicles. And the hospital equipment was cleverly disguised as proper furniture. </p><p>“How long have I been here, Leon?”</p><p>Leon looked uncomfortable, but he was ever the dutiful, honest friend Arthur had come to know him to be. “Two days, sir.”</p><p>“Two days!” The shock gave him the motivation and determination needed to push himself to sitting.</p><p>“Please be calm, sir,” Leon implored, helping him adjust the pillows behind him. “You need to rest and get your strength back.”</p><p>Arthur settled back against his pillows. He looked over at Leon. “What do the doctors say?” </p><p>“Severe hypothermia, due to the length of time you were in the water. You were unconscious for some time after we pulled you out, and you were taken straight here, but your prognosis is good. You’re young, fit, healthy. You responded well to treatment.”</p><p>“How soon can I get out?” he asked, thinking of Merlin and hoping he wasn’t worried about not hearing from him. “Does anyone else know?”</p><p>Leon smothered a laugh. “I apologise, Your Highness. But, yes. You’re the Prince of Wales, so of course the press know, and therefore…”</p><p>“...everyone knows,” Arthur finished. His gut lurched, even as he could feel his energy levels crashing. Merlin must be going out of his mind with worry. “Leon, my phone, I need to…”</p><p>“It was damaged beyond repair, sir. I will arrange for a replacement. You should rest, sir.”</p><p>“But I…” yawned Arthur. “I need to…”</p><p>“Please, sir, the more you rest, the sooner you can go home.”</p><p>“Home,” repeated Arthur, the word sounding nice in his mouth as his eyelids drooped and he started to drift off to sleep.</p><p>- - -</p><p>Merlin pressed his fingertips to his mouth as he watched the morning news, waiting to see if there was an update on Arthur. He’d had a restless night, finding it difficult to sleep not knowing what was going on. Surely Arthur would be okay. He <i>had</i> to be okay. People got pneumonia all the time. Didn’t they? Surely it was rare not to recover from it. Arthur had to be okay. They’d probably hospitalised him as a precaution. Arthur just had to be fine. Merlin needed Arthur to be fine. He needed to talk to him, to tell him what he had realised during the long hours of the night. He didn’t care about all the bells and whistles, the duties, the press and invasions of privacy, or the restrictions on his freedom that would come from being with Arthur. He just wanted to be with him. </p><p>He had tried to comfort himself that, if it was truly life-threatening, the news cycle would be full of Arthur and little else, and that was what had helped him through the night.</p><p>He’d called again that morning, knowing that Arthur probably wouldn’t answer but needing to try. In the end, he decided to leave a voicemail, though it had taken him several tries to pull himself together enough to do it.</p><p>As the music faded out, the news anchor announced the headlines. Merlin let out a breath he hadn’t even known he was holding when the second headline was, ‘The Prince of Wales hospitalised. Sources close to the palace say that Prince Arthur was treated for pneumonia, but is recovering well and will be discharged from hospital tomorrow. More on this later.’</p><p>“Oh, thank God,” Merlin breathed. He pressed his hands to his eyes, surprised to find them wet with tears. He swiped the moisture away hurriedly with his sleeve, thankful for the good news he’d been hoping for. </p><p>“Merlin,” called his mum from the kitchen. “Breakfast is ready.”</p><p>He smiled faintly at her as she came into the room. “Thanks, Mum.”</p><p>She looked at him strangely, but didn’t comment as he made his way to the kitchen to eat breakfast.</p><p>Merlin passed the rest of his day with Hunith, visiting around the village and helping with the festivities, delighting in making baubles and sweets appear from thin air for little Cerys and the other village children. </p><p>“How are you, Merlin?” Freya asked him kindly. “You look tired.”</p><p>“I should be asking you that,” he said, nodding his head at her barely visible bump. He had been able to feel the little life fluttering there from the moment he’d entered the room, that little spark of magic that was working to create new life. “Does Will know?”</p><p>“Not yet,” she said, watching as Will played with their daughter. “I’m going to tell him at Christmas.”</p><p>“He’s going to be thrilled.”</p><p>Freya smiled as she watched her husband and child. “I know.”</p><p>The way she gazed at them made Merlin’s heart melt. He recognised that feeling, that emotion. It was the same way he felt when he watched Arthur being noble and strong and caring. He wondered if they would ever have kids together. Arthur would be a good dad. He needed to get better first, though. It was way too early to be thinking about anything like that.</p><p>“Merlin?” said Freya, waving her hand in front of his face. He startled.</p><p>“Sorry.” </p><p>“I was asking how things were going for you. How are you doing at uni? It’s your last year, isn’t it?” </p><p>“Depends,” said Merlin.</p><p>He neglected to mention that the reason he hadn’t decided yet was because it depended on how things were going to go with Arthur. Would they allow him to continue his studies if they were officially together? Or would he be forced to hang around a palace or something all day, and go out greeting people, or whatever it was royals did?</p><p>It startled Merlin to realise that he wasn’t as concerned about the answer to that as he once had been. If it turned out he wasn’t supposed to continue his studies, in such a situation… Well, he and Arthur were going to be breaking a lot of barriers with their relationship. What was another one to add to the list? Why couldn’t they break with tradition and do what they needed to do? </p><p>Before last night, Merlin hadn’t really allowed himself to imagine what the future might be like for himself and Arthur beyond university. He hadn’t wanted to deal with it if he wasn’t… if he wasn’t sure that he wanted to be with Arthur more than he wanted the freedom to do whatever he wanted to with his life without asking for permission. Last night, when he was worrying about Arthur—and he was still worrying about Arthur—when he had faced the possibility, the idea, of losing him… Everything had suddenly become clear. He wanted Arthur in his life, and he wanted to be in <i>Arthur’s</i> life, regardless of the circumstances, because he couldn’t imagine his life without Arthur being in it. </p><p>“Oh, yeah?” said Freya. “What does it depend on?”</p><p>“My boyfriend,” Merlin said honestly.</p><p>“Ooooh, you didn’t tell me you had a boyfriend. Tell me about him.”</p><p>“He’s a stubborn arse,” said Merlin, thinking of how hard Arthur had been working himself lately, and how determined he had been to get Merlin to come with him to Balmoral. Merlin, however, had proven more stubborn than Arthur, which was why he was stuck here in Ealdor, and they were hundreds of miles apart.</p><p>Freya laughed. “He sounds like you,” she said. “You have to give me more to go on than that. What’s he like? What does he do? Is he handsome? How long have you been dating? And, again, why didn’t you tell me?”</p><p>“He’s… not like anyone else I know,” said Merlin. His thoughts drifted to Arthur and his various displays of kindness and nobility, and the contrast of his privileged royal upbringing, which had left him not even knowing how to boil an egg before he’d come to university. Even now, Arthur would marvel at the occasional everyday experience. “And very handsome. Though I reserve the right to deny that I ever told you that! We’ve been together… about ten months now, I think. I guess it just slipped my mind.”</p><p>“Well, you must bring him home and let us all meet him. Have you invited him for Calennig?”</p><p>Merlin nodded. “I did. But… well, his family life is… complicated, so he couldn’t make it. He invited me to come and spend Christmas with him in Scotland. I told him no. But now I’m thinking I should have gone.”</p><p>“You miss him?”</p><p>“Every day.”</p><p>“Don’t worry. I’m sure you’ll be back with him soon, forgetting about all of us.”</p><p>“Never!” said Merlin. “You know I could never forget you.”</p><p>Freya’s cheeks coloured and she squeezed his hand.</p><p>Freya had been his first girlfriend and his first kiss. They’d bonded strongly when she’d first come to the village, after her mother had moved there to get them away from her abusive father. Merlin could relate to being raised by a single mother, having never met his own father. It had given them a shared experience. </p><p>Things hadn’t worked out between them, obviously. Because Merlin was gay. He had realised that even acting performatively, in the ways that were expected of him, couldn’t change that. Despite that, they had remained the best of friends. Freya liked to joke that she made him gay. </p><p>Freya had gone on to find her own happiness in Merlin’s other best friend, Will. And whilst Merlin was happy for them both, secretly he had mourned the loss of the closeness that he’d had with each of them. </p><p>Truth be told, he’d felt a bit rudderless when he’d gone off to uni; Freya and Will were setting up house together at home, whilst he’d been heading off on an unknown adventure. The feelings had soon passed though as he’d fallen headlong into university life and made new friends and discovered the world of dating, something that would have been impossible in sleepy little Ealdor where he was the only gay person that he knew of.</p><p>“Merlin!” called his mother. “Are you ready to go? I promised Mary we’d stop by before dinner.”</p><p>“Coming, Mum!” he called. He smiled at Freya, giving her a hug and pressing a kiss to her cheek. “Take care of yourself, yeah? And this little one,” he said, touching a hand to her belly.</p><p>- - -</p><p>Arthur closed the door behind him with a relieved sigh. It was good to be home, finally. Being at the hospital had been horrible, even though he knew he’d needed to be there. He hadn’t realised just how close he’d been to dying when he’d been brought in. His memories of the time were blurry at best, but once he had started to feel better and was on the road to recovery, his doctor had explained things to him. </p><p>He slumped down in a chair by the fire as a wave of exhaustion hit him, reminding him that he wasn’t out of the woods yet. He’d been told to rest up and to expect to feel tired and achy for the next couple of days.</p><p>There was a knock on the door.</p><p>“Come!” called Arthur. </p><p>Leon slid into the room and approached him. He handed him a mobile phone. “Your replacement, sir. I took the liberty of retrieving your SIM and memory cards from your own phone and syncing your accounts. You should be able to find all the same information on there as was on your previous phone.”</p><p>“Thank you, Leon,” Arthur told him, accepting the phone eagerly.</p><p>“If that’s to your satisfaction, I will take my leave, sir. Unless there’s anything else I can get you?”</p><p>“No, no, this is perfect. Thank you, Leon. Have a good evening.”</p><p>Arthur waited until Leon had left the room until he turned on the phone. He found over fifty missed calls from various different numbers, some of whom he knew and others which he assumed were the press trying to get a hold of him. </p><p>He ignored all of those. Instead, he scrolled through his contacts until he reached “Idiot” and pressed dial.</p><p>The phone barely rang twice before his call was picked up.</p><p>“Arthur?” came Merlin’s breathless voice.</p><p>“Merlin,” he said, the tension leaving him all at once.</p><p>“Arthur! It IS you. Are you okay? I saw the news. What happened? I’ve been so worried!” </p><p>Arthur smiled. As tough as the last few days had been, it was nice to know Merlin had been worried for him.</p><p>“Of course it’s me. I’m fine. Tired, but fine.”</p><p>“Are you sure? When I heard that you had pneumonia and were in the hospital... I couldn’t find out anything. I couldn’t contact anyone… Arthur…”</p><p>Arthur swallowed the lump in his throat as he listened to Merlin getting increasingly distressed.</p><p>“I know,” he said. “I know, I should have— I wanted to… but we haven’t… and my phone. I didn’t have it, it was destroyed. I should have had Leon find your number and contact you. But I just got home and I called as soon as I could.”</p><p>He could hear Merlin on the other end of the line, taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I shouldn’t be worrying you. I’m sure that you need rest, not a panicky boyfriend. They said you had pneumonia. But I don’t understand. You were okay when we last spoke. What happened?”</p><p>Arthur groaned and rubbed his face with his hand. “I’ll tell you, as long as you promise not to laugh.”</p><p>“I don’t know, it sounds as though that might be a promise I can’t keep,” teased Merlin. </p><p>“You know that Father and I went on that fishing trip…”</p><p>“Yes, of course I do. That’s the last time that I— Oh my God. You clotpole, did you fall in? You didn’t, did you?”</p><p>“I—” </p><p>“You did! How did you manage that?”</p><p>“Well, I caught a fish and I was reeling it in, but I was a bit distracted; you see, I’d just told my father I’d met someone, and confessed that I’m gay, when I slipped and—”</p><p>“Wait, wait. You told your father about us?”</p><p>Arthur rose from his seat. He needed a drink if they were going to have this conversation. He made his way over to the sideboard to pick up a decanter of whiskey and poured himself a measure. “Yes, Merlin. Keep up.”</p><p>“Okay,” said Merlin, his voice a little off. “So you fell in, and then what happened?”</p><p>Making his way back to the fire, Arthur sat and took a sip. </p><p>“What do you think happened? I fell in a lake in Scotland in the middle of winter. I knew it was a crazy idea when my father announced it. But he insisted we go.” </p><p>Pausing for a moment, Arthur debated how much of the story he should tell. Merlin was already panicked. An abridged version would do. </p><p>“I don’t remember much beyond that. Just how cold it was. My father wasn’t able to pull me back into the boat, so I was in the water longer than was optimal. They took me to the hospital as a precaution, to make sure I was okay. And here I am. Fine and talking to you.”</p><p>“What did you father say about… you know, us?”</p><p>Arthur took a deep swig of his drink at the thought of <i>that</i> impending conversation. “We haven’t talked about it yet. It can wait.”</p><p>“I wish I could be there with you,” Merlin confessed after a brief lull in their conversation. </p><p>Arthur thought of his bed in the next room: huge and grandiose and empty. “Me, too,” he agreed. “Me, too.”</p><p>- - -</p><p>The next morning, Arthur was woken early by George. Apparently not even recovering from a near-death experience afforded you a lie-in with his father around.</p><p>Arthur sighed as he tied his tie with a windsor knot. He wished he didn’t have to do this. He’d barely been home for twenty-four hours, but his father had insisted that he make a public appearance to show the world that all was well, and that he was strong and recovered from his ordeal.</p><p>He had been extremely displeased to see detailed accounts of Arthur’s accident and hospitalisation splashed across the newspapers and TV shows that morning. So was Arthur. </p><p>He had woken up to a string of text messages from Merlin who had chewed him out for neglecting to mention how serious his accident had been. And then he’d had to attend breakfast with his father and talk with him for the first time since his confession. His father had ignored the subject entirely, focusing on niceties such as the weather and their upcoming visit to church, but the tension had been so thick you could cut it with a knife, and Arthur was left dreading the actual conversation. Not that his father would be able to change his mind, but it was sure to be unpleasant. </p><p>Now, he was preparing himself for the church visit. George had ensured that he had a new suit, pressed within an inch of its life, and now he stood in front of the mirror examining himself critically. There was a reason he hadn’t video-called Merlin the night before. He looked like shit. If his father thought they would be fooling anyone with this charade, he was sadly mistaken. No amount of nice suits and well-combed hair could hide the fact that Arthur had been through an ordeal.</p><p>A thought occurred to Arthur that perhaps he could ask Morgana for some make up. If he was going to be on camera, he’d have been taken care of by a makeup artist. He glanced at his watch and thought about Morgana’s rooms at the other end of the castle. There wasn’t enough time. Not to mention, he doubted that he would have been able to make it there without a rest half way through. </p><p>At least they were going to the church by car. In the summer months, they walked the short distance from the estate, over the river to Crathie Kirk. But it was impossible to do that in their church finest during winter. Though Arthur always enjoyed the walk, he was thankful to be driven; his legs didn’t feel quite right and his head pounded. Not to mention that he had an awful cough that kept rearing its head. </p><p>He slid a packet of lozenges into his pocket before taking one last look at himself in the mirror. He straightened his tie and flattened a wayward strand of hair, then headed off to meet his father and Morgana at the carriage porch.</p><p>- - -</p><p>Merlin sat down on the sofa and placed his tea on the coffee table, passing one over to his mum.</p><p>“Diolch,” she said softly as she changed the channel over to BBC One. </p><p>Merlin did a double-take when he saw Arthur on the TV. It wasn’t an entirely unusual event, but still an unexpected one. His attention piqued, he grabbed his tea and settled down. The BBC reporter was explaining that the royal family were attending the first of two church services today, and instantly Merlin felt sorry for Arthur. How awfully boring to have to spend the best part of Christmas Eve in <i>church</i>. Especially a church that didn’t accept who you were.</p><p>The cameras focused on King Uther getting out of the car, holding out his hand to help Princess Morgana out, and then Arthur gracefully unfolded himself and exited the vehicle behind them. The king and Princess Morgana appeared to be engaged in some kind of conversation that they were both finding entertaining, as they smiled and linked arms. Arthur hovered closely behind them as they walked towards the church.</p><p>Merlin’s face folded into a scowl as the cameras zeroed in on Arthur to get a close up. Of course. That was why they were showing this. They were all desperate to get the first pictures of Arthur after his accident. The palace had put out a brief statement confirming the broad details that Arthur had told Merlin, but the gossip wheels had been turning and <i>someone</i> had spoken in more detail to the press about the harrowing ordeal of seeing Arthur being pulled from the water, unresponsive. Merlin pursed his lips. He was still ready and waiting to give Arthur a proper earful the next time he saw him.</p><p>“You seem awfully interested in the royals and all this Prince Arthur news lately, cariad,” his mother commented.</p><p>Merlin hummed non-committedly as he carried on watching Arthur on the TV. His face fell as he realised how tired and washed out the prince was. He looked unwell, and Merlin’s anger towards him melted away. </p><p>Arthur stumbled a little on the pathway to the church. It was barely noticeable unless you were watching closely, as he quickly righted himself, but Merlin saw it. Anger returned to him, this time not at Arthur but at his father for forcing Arthur back into his duties when he’d barely even stepped foot back in the castle.</p><p>
  <i>“...of course, Prince Arthur has been working hard on his degree at St Andrews this year, and has come to Balmoral to spend Christmas with his father and sister, as they have done since the first year that King Uther married his mother, Queen Ygraine…”</i>
</p><p>“Did you hear that, Merlin? St Andrews. Just like you!”</p><p>Merlin stiffened, and shrugged, hoping his mother would muse on it and then let that little fact go, rather than put any serious thought into it. She was far too shrewd when she got on the case.</p><p>“Have you seen him on campus?”</p><p>“Mum!”</p><p>“I know that it’s a pretty big place and you might go your entire time there without having met a specific person who went there, but I would think a person would remember if they’d seen a prince, and such a handsome one at that.”</p><p>Merlin felt the tips of his ears heat and hurried to try and cover for himself by sipping his tea. Hunith chuckled. </p><p>“Oh, cariad. Do you have a crush? Is that why you’ve been so worried about him?” </p><p>Merlin cringed. She was too close for comfort.</p><p>A change of tone in the reporter’s voice brought both their attention back to the TV. </p><p><i>“...oh my goodness! The Prince of Wales has just collapsed…”</i> </p><p>The cameras cut away from the church, where a group of people, Leon amongst them, were gathered around Arthur, and back to the news studio.</p><p>“Our royal correspondent, Jonny Dymond, reporting from Balmoral there, where Prince Arthur, who was making his first public appearance since his accident a few days ago, has collapsed.”</p><p>Merlin’s cup of tea fell from his hand as a raw panic took hold of him, so strong he almost retched.</p><p>“Merlin?” asked his mother, anxiously. “Merlin, what’s wrong?”</p><p>“I— I need to get to Scotland,” Merlin managed to tell her.</p><p>His mother gasped. “<i>Merlin Emrys</i>, are you dating <i>the Prince of Wales</i>”</p><p>Merlin opened his mouth to speak, but no words would come out. He nodded his head mutely as words failed him.</p><p>“Mum, please,” he said, his voice barely a whisper. “I need to get to him.”</p><p>“Pack a bag,” she told him with grim determination. “Then we’ll go.”</p><p>- - -</p><p>Merlin pressed his forehead against the window of the car. It was cold and grounding as the car whisked through the night—courtesy of his mum, who, for once, had thankfully not asked him a million questions about how he had come to be dating Arthur. </p><p>He couldn’t drive himself; he didn’t have a licence. But even if he could, he doubted that his own ability and faculties would allow him to right now. His mind felt like it was running at a hundred miles an hour as he allowed all the worst case scenarios to run through his head.</p><p>What if Arthur was seriously ill—deathly ill? What if they didn’t make it in time? What if Merlin couldn’t see him? He <i>had</i> to see him. His magic churned and fizzled, as though disturbed by his discomfort and current state of mind. If they tried to stop him, he could always use magic. When it came to Arthur, his magic was ready and waiting to do whatever it took to see him. </p><p>He let out a loud sigh.</p><p>His mother reached out and patted his leg. </p><p>“It’ll be okay, cariad,” she said softly. “He’ll be okay. You’ll see.”</p><p>They continued driving through the night, only stopping to get fuel and bad coffee at a twenty-four hour petrol station on the motorway. </p><p>As the miles ticked by, Merlin watched the time until their destination slowly going down on the sat nav. The hours, like the road, seemed never-ending as they drove and drove. Eventually, his mother turned on the car radio to fill the eerie silence of the car. They were rarely silent like this when they were together, as he and his mother had always been close, but she seemed to understand that Merlin couldn’t bear to talk right now and that the last thing he needed to hear were hollow platitudes.</p><p>Finally, like a beacon of hope, the sun started to rise on the horizon, bringing with it the promise of a new day. And as Merlin saw the first sign that mentioned Balmoral, he felt like he might finally be able to breathe again.</p><p>- - -</p><p>Arthur blinked a little as a harsh light seared against his eyes. As the world around him came into focus, he realised that he was back in his room at Balmoral. There was a movement beside him. He turned his head to his left to see his father sitting in a chair in the bright glow of a floor lamp.</p><p>“Father?” he asked.</p><p>“Arthur. How are you feeling?” Uther asked calmly.</p><p>Arthur grimaced and barely held back a groan as he tried to sit himself up. </p><p>“Like I was hit by a lorry.”</p><p>Uther motioned for him to lay down.</p><p>“Rest, Arthur.”</p><p>Arthur frowned as he tried to recall what had happened. His last memory was of walking to the church and feeling unbalanced and sick. </p><p>“What happened?” he asked his father.</p><p>“You collapsed at the church this morning,” Uther said. “Gaius has checked you over, though; he believes that you are suffering from exhaustion and with plenty of rest and fluids you should be fine. You may eat as and when you can tolerate it. He anticipates that if you are a good patient, you will be back to normal within the week.”</p><p>Arthur harrumphed, unamused. He hated being sick. He liked to be active and doing things. He didn’t know any different really. Though he had let his studies slip a little since he’d met Merlin, his social activities and occasional royal duties had not reduced any, and he enjoyed being busy. But Arthur had been burning both ends of the candle for too long, and his accident had brought everything crashing down.</p><p>“I’m sorry, son. I shouldn’t have pushed you to come to church this morning.”</p><p>“It’s fine,” said Arthur, waving away his father’s apology. “Had to keep up appearances and all that. Sorry to let you down.”</p><p>Uther reached out and gripped his hand. “No, Arthur. It is I who let you down. I should have listened to your doctors and allowed you to have a full recovery from your ordeal. I’ve been thinking whilst you slept, and your mother would be so disappointed in me.”</p><p>“Father… You don’t need to...” said Arthur, shaking his head.</p><p>He let the words hang in the air, and a hush fell over the room. </p><p>Finally, Arthur broke it. This was the first time his father had spoken properly with him, alone, since his accident—since he had made his confession—and Arthur could tell that it was on his mind. He wouldn’t have mentioned Mother otherwise. </p><p>“Are we going to talk about it?” he asked. Following it up quickly with, “You know what I mean.” Knowing that otherwise his father would feign ignorance.</p><p>“Well, I have to admit, it was a bit of a surprise for me. How long have you been feeling that way?”</p><p>Arthur tried to think about when he had realised that he was gay. He wasn’t sure there was ever a big epiphany. It was more of a gradual awakening, a slow realisation that he found men attractive. Granted, that feeling was likely heightened by attending a boys’ boarding school, wherein homosexual activities were somewhat normalised. Arthur had had his first kiss at school, as well as his first reciprocal sexual experience when he’d got another boy off in the showers. There’d been an exchange of blowjobs at night with the same boy before the inevitable rejection, because the boy claimed he wasn’t ‘queer’.</p><p>Bedeviere was now married to a woman with two children and had blanked him the last time they had been at the same event. The memory still hurt.</p><p>“I’m not sure,” Arthur replied.</p><p>“And how long have you been carrying on with this boy? I assume you met at that university of yours.”</p><p>“Yes. We met during a literature class.” </p><p>Arthur smiled at the memory of Merlin’s disdain for him. Merlin had been the most gorgeous looking man he’d ever seen; he had taken Arthur’s breath away when he first saw him. Arthur had plotted there and then to see as much of Merlin as he could, planning to make sure that he would choose the same kinds of topics and ensuring that his position in the lecture hall would give him a perfect view of him. Little did Arthur know that, eventually, he would get to see <i>all</i> of Merlin. </p><p>And the crazy thing was, Merlin didn’t even realise how good-looking he was. He dressed like a teenager trying to make it big with an indie band. And best of all, he’d been the only person in the entire room who hadn’t been in awe or sucked up to Arthur.</p><p>There was just something about Merlin that Arthur hadn’t been able to put his finger on. It was like he was drawn to him, like a moth to a flame.</p><p>“You love him,” his father stated, bringing Arthur back to earth with a bump. “I can tell. Well, believe it or not, I know how that feels.”</p><p>His father smiled fondly. It wasn’t a look Arthur saw on him all that often, but he knew his father was remembering his mother.</p><p>“I felt the same way about Ygraine, there was just something about her that was so good, so special and enchanting. I miss her every day.”</p><p>Arthur watched him, waiting. He didn’t want to say anything that might stop his father from reminiscing. He so rarely talked to Arthur about his mother that he drank up every mention of her.</p><p>“You are so like her,” his father said softly. “You have her eyes. So this boy, he’s The One, then?”</p><p>Arthur gave a determined nod.</p><p>“Then I won’t get in your way. But I’m warning you Arthur, this won’t be easy. The press will likely eat you alive.”</p><p>“I don’t care,” said Arthur. All the mattered was that he was free to choose Merlin.</p><p>“You realise that I will have to meet this young man. You should have invited him to spend Christmas.”</p><p>“I did,” said Arthur with a scowl. “He said he wasn’t ready yet.”</p><p>“He will be,” said Uther, patting Arthur’s hand. “If he is The One, then everything will work out. Now, I should be going. I will need to start speaking with Geoffrey about how we… prepare for your announcement when the time comes. Get some rest, and I’ll see you in the morning.”</p><p>“Thank you, Father.”</p><p>“Goodnight, Arthur,” said Uther, getting up from the chair. </p><p>- - -</p><p>Merlin pushed his hair out of his eyes for the umpteenth time, only for the torrential rain to force it down again. He grimaced and tugged at the wrench, trying to get the last wheel nut off. </p><p>Everything had been going so well. They weren’t even that far away from Balmoral now. They were, however, basically in the middle of nowhere with no mobile phone signal and a punctured tyre.</p><p>“How are you doing?” his mother called from under her umbrella. Merlin had insisted she use one, since she had put her foot down that she wanted to help him change the tyre. “Do you need me to help?”</p><p>“No, Mum. I’m almost—” he pushed down on the wrench with all his might, giving a little push of magic as a last ditch effort to help, and felt a wave of relief as it suddenly gave, “—done.”</p><p>He finished removing the other wheel nuts and then tugged the tyre off. His mother took the damaged tyre, moving it away whilst Merlin with his tired arms—possible witnesses be damned—used his magic to lift the spare and place it on the wheel. He swiped at his face again with his arm, his hands an oily mess. </p><p>Soon, he was replacing and tightening the wheel nuts, with magic, rather than tools this time. And after putting the ruined tyre into the boot they got going again.</p><p>“Oh, Merlin,” said his mother, as she took in his disheveled appearance. She pulled a small pack of wet wipes from her handbag. “Here, clean yourself up. You have a prince to impress. And it’s Christmas, too. I refuse to present you to a prince on Christmas day in that condition.”</p><p>Merlin laughed half-heartedly and took them from her. “Merry Christmas, Mum.”</p><p>She smiled at him and ruffed his wet hair. “Merry Christmas, cariad.”</p><p>Hunith started the car and they continued on their way. Merlin started to get his hopes up as he started to spot more signs for Balmoral and the area started to get a bit more built up than the rural country road they’d been on.</p><p>“So how are we going to get onto the grounds of a royal residence, exactly?” his mother asked.</p><p>“I haven’t thought that far ahead,” Merlin admitted to her, picking at his damp jeans. “I could always…” </p><p>He waggled his fingers to indicate using his magic. Oh yeah, he could magic to sort himself out. He muttered a spell and instantly he was warm and dry, even if his clothes were still caked in mud. His mother gave him a glare. She hated him doing magic outside of the house. She worried that he would get snatched up by the government in some kind of x-files style heist. But Merlin had grown comfortable with using it subtly here and there, and he’d be damned if he was going to sit in a car, in wet clothing if he could help otherwise. The last thing he needed was to get sick himself, in addition to Arthur. He applied the same logic when it came to reaching Arthur. He’d move the earth to make it happen.</p><p>“No,” Hunith replied firmly. “You don’t know what would happen if you got caught.”</p><p>Merlin rolled his eyes. Mum always worried about what would happen if he got caught. As if he couldn’t just escape from the clutches of anyone who caught him with said magic. Or influence them, even. There had been times when he’d done that —unintentionally, of course. He’d never knowingly force someone to do something against their will, not unless it was a life or death situation, so he’d never actually tried it out, but he was pretty sure that it wouldn’t be an issue.</p><p>Hunith swatted at him with her hand, keeping her eyes on the road.</p><p>“Fine, I won’t,” he relented. </p><p>As they grew closer to their destination, Merlin directed her to take a turn off of the main road that led towards the heart of the estate. It would probably be easier to sneak onto the grounds from some kind of country backroad and make his way to the castle from there.</p><p>They pulled up in a rural layby near a farm field, the castle looming in the background.</p><p>“Thanks for driving me,” he said.</p><p>Hunith glanced over at him. “You don’t think I’m going in on your own, do you?” </p><p>“Um.” Yet again, Merlin hadn’t really thought his plan through. The only thought that had been running through his head had been that he needed to get to Arthur. </p><p>“I’ve held off asking, because I knew that you were determined to get here come hell or high water,” said his mother. “And I’d rather have driven you and known that you got here safely than let you attempt to get here on your own. But I have to ask: what exactly are you hoping to accomplish by rushing here to see Prince Arthur that you couldn’t do over the phone or by video? Aside from being able to see with your own two eyes that he’s okay.”</p><p>Merlin stared at his hands in his lap. “I need to tell him that I want to be with him. No matter what. We talked before Christmas. A lot. He wanted me to come and stay with him here, but I told him that I wasn’t sure about us. I wasn’t sure what our future was, because I wasn’t sure that I could deal with all of the baggage that he comes with. We agreed that I’d think about it some more over Christmas. Because we both know this relationship won’t work unless I’m all in, and I know now what I want.”</p><p>“Oh, cariad,” she said sympathetically. “I can understand wanting to tell him as much in person, but all the best intentions in the world won’t get you past the gates. So let’s come up with a plan to get you to your prince.”</p><p>- - -</p><p>After checking the GPS on Merlin’s phone, they left the car and headed out through the fields heading towards the castle. The fields glistened with frost that had yet to meet the morning sun, and there was chill in the air that cut right through Merlin’s jacket, still muddy from his tyre changing efforts. He grit his teeth and set his mind on getting to the castle and finding Arthur. They made their way through the icy morning air, traipsing over several fields and through a small area of woodland, before the castle finally came into view, looming large and imposing in the distance, a brick wall surrounding the perimeter. A group of men appeared at the far end of the field. Merlin looked around in a panic, searching for somewhere to hide. But it was of no use: beside them was a small hedgerow that stretched out as far as he could see, and the previous field was some way back now, completely inaccessible.</p><p>His heart sank. These men didn’t look like farmers. They looked exactly like the kind of men who looked after Arthur if he was venturing too far from campus, dressed in clothes that were supposed to be ‘casual’, but were still far too formal. These men were some kind of security for the royal family; Merlin would put money on it. He had anticipated being spotted at some point, but he’d hoped to at least make it within throwing distance of the castle before they were sighted. To be caught with the castle still so far away was frankly embarrassing. If only Mum hadn’t forbidden him to use magic. He could have used his abilities to create some kind of diversion, or to conceal them in some way. There was this thing that he used to do when he was at secondary school that would make the gaze of someone who was looking at him just slip away without them even realising it. It had saved him from many of the after school beatings that came of being the only gay kid at school.</p><p>“I guess the game is up,” Merlin said with a sigh, as the men continued their forward momentum, and in an effort to get things over with Merlin and Hunith started to make their way over to meet them.</p><p>“Just remember the plan. You leave this to me,” his mum told him with a wink. “Excuse me,” she called to the men as soon as they got close enough. “Excuse me! We were wondering if you could help us?”</p><p>One of the men stepped away from the group and approached them. </p><p>“Of course, Madam. What appears to be the problem?” he asked.</p><p>“We’ve been staying in a village somewhere near here. Braemar?” his mum said. “My son and I wanted to have a little walk before our Christmas dinner. I’m sure you know how Christmas morning is not as exciting as it once was when our kids were little. Merlin here used to be so excited that he couldn’t wait to rush downstairs and open his presents. That was after having eaten so much of his stocking chocolate that he was almost sick, of course. Nowadays, Christmas is more about spending time together. And it’s not that we aren’t enjoying our walk, it’s just that, well. I think we rather underestimated the temperature...”</p><p>She shivered and rubbed her arms and stamped her feet, then rubbed Merlin’s arm through his muddy coat. </p><p>“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I thought I knew where we were going. I could have sworn there was a footpath somewhere around here.”</p><p>Merlin shuddered for real then, as a cutting wind swept past them, almost taking his breath away. A flurry of snowflakes started to fall. </p><p>“Braemar?” said the man, finally getting a word in edgeways. “You’re a long way off course.”</p><p>“Oh dear,” said Hunith, looking sad as she glanced up into the snow, which was now starting to fall at quite a pace.</p><p>The man followed her gaze and looked at the landscape around them as though analysing the situation. </p><p>“I could give you directions back,” he said. “But this snow is going to set in fast. I suggest you allow us to escort you back to the premises and we can arrange for someone to drive you back to where you’re staying.”</p><p>“That would be wonderful,” said Hunith, who had also started to shiver.</p><p>Merlin’s teeth chattered as the man pulled some kind of radio or phone off his belt. He held it up to his ear. </p><p>“This is 0072, reporting from the South-West perimeter. Over. Yes. Nothing to worry about. A lost pair of ramblers. Permission to bring them in. Adverse weather conditions. Over. Yes, it’s really starting to lay down thick out here. Thank you, sir. Of course. Yes, I will. Over.”</p><p>He turned to Merlin and Hunith. “Come with us, we’ll get you warmed up and on your way again.”</p><p>They trudged through the snow towards the castle. Merlin tried not to draw too much attention to himself, worried that he might be recognised, though he didn’t think he’d seen any of the men from this security detail before. Maybe they were King Uther’s men? Or specific to this property. Either way, it was best to keep a low profile.</p><p>As it turned out, he needn’t have worried too much. Everyone seemed more absorbed with getting to the castle  and out of the snowstorm as soon as possible than making small talk or paying too much attention to him. Once they were through the gated wall, and drawing closer to the castle, Merlin noted that the men had gathered around them, ensuring they were surrounded. He didn’t like the feeling it gave him, his magic prickling uncomfortably beneath his skin. He hoped that they wouldn’t give him reason to use it.</p><p>The men took them into the castle through a side door, and as everyone started to take off their snowy shoes and coats, Merlin was pleasantly surprised to find the porch was attached to a rather homey country kitchen.</p><p>“Follow me, please,” the man who had called himself 0072 said, the rest of the detail seemingly having melted away.</p><p>Merlin and Hunith did as they were instructed, and trailed behind him as he opened the door into the kitchen, waves of heat flooding out. Merlin’s stomach growled at the smell of fresh baking that pervaded the roomy kitchen.</p><p>“If you’d take a seat, I can call for Mary. She’ll fix you up with a cup of tea and something to eat, then I will arrange a lift for you back to the village. If you’ll excuse me for a few moments, and please, make yourselves comfortable.”</p><p>“Thank you so much,” said Hunith appreciatively as she sat at the old wooden table to wait. </p><p>Merlin joined her, his sharp eyes taking in the kitchen. There were three ways out of the room: the door they’d come in from; one over on the far side, near the fireplace; and a further door to the left that the man had exited through. He wondered how far away Arthur was from him right now. How was he doing? Was he sleeping? Most likely. At least he wasn’t in hospital again; Merlin had scanned the news websites once they’d had 4G again and hadn’t found any updates to indicate as much, so he could only conclude that the prince was here somewhere.</p><p>He leaned in towards his mother and whispered, “I’m going to find Arthur. If they ask, tell them I’m looking for the toilet. That I was bursting.”</p><p>“Merlin,” she said warningly. “Are you sure that’s such a good idea? They’ve been nothing but nice to us. Why don’t we come clean when the man comes back and ask if you can see him? Surely Arthur will vouch for you.”</p><p>Merlin shook his head. “They won’t even let us get that far, Mum. I know how they work. I’ve been with Arthur long enough. They’ll toss us out as soon as they find out and we’ll get charges brought against us. Then Arthur will have the headache of getting them to drop them. Just play along. If you don’t want to lie, tell them you don’t  know where I went. Strictly speaking, it’ll be true. I’ll message you as soon as I can, okay?”</p><p>He gave her a hug and then got up, eyeing the door by the fireplace.</p><p>“Love you!” he called as he slipped through it.</p><p>On the other side of the door was an empty corridor that stretched out a long way to both his right and his left. Knowing that he wouldn’t have long until he was missed, Merlin made the decision to turn left and hurried down the hallway.</p><p>He figured that they must be in a part of the castle that was used by castle staff. He couldn’t imagine that Arthur’s room would be all that close, so he decided to get as far away as possible from this end of the castle and watch out for anything that might clue him in to where Arthur might be.</p><p>Merlin made pretty good time as he hurried through hallways, poking his head into various breathtaking rooms and halls. He’d already passed through what he thought might be a ballroom, a receiving hall and a rather lavish dining room without encountering anyone. If only he knew where he was heading, he might have a hope of reaching Arthur without being intercepted. So far, the only people he’d seen were a cleaner, whom he’d evaded by ducking into a room, and another household staffer who was in a hurry and hadn’t noticed him as he’d hidden in a darkened corner behind a suit of armour.</p><p>As he turned a corner and started making his way down another yet corridor, just off of the dining hall, he began to despair that he’d ever find Arthur. He had really wanted to surprise him, but maybe at this point he should cut his losses and call to let him know he was in the castle. As he slid his hand into his pocket to get his phone, however, Merlin’s luck finally ran out.</p><p>“Hey, you! Stop right there!” someone yelled. Merlin froze in place. His magic surged, sparking at his fingers. He held his breath, not daring to move, but preparing for the worst. He knew that royal bodyguards carried weapons — he hadn’t wanted to mention it to his mother, for fear of scaring her, but it was very prominent in his mind now that he had been caught wandering the castle on his own.</p><p>He slowly raised his hands in the air as he heard the man’s footsteps coming up behind him, taking a deep breath as he readied himself for whatever might happen.</p><p>There was an audible click. “Keep your hands up where I can see them and then turn around,” said the man.</p><p>Merlin did as he was told and slowly turned.</p><p>An astonished look spread across the man’s face as he lowered his gun, bewildered. Merlin felt the relief flood through him as he realised it was Leon. </p><p>“Merlin?” he said.</p><p>“Surprise!” said Merlin with a wide grin.</p><p>Leon put his gun back in his holster. “What are you doing here?” he asked.</p><p>“Arthur’s sick. I couldn’t stay away. Not after yesterday.”</p><p>Leon nodded with understanding. “You know that the rest of the security detail aren’t going to like this, don’t you? How the devil did you manage to get in?” </p><p>“I—”</p><p>Two men came running up with their guns drawn. Leon signalled to them to stand down. </p><p>“It’s okay,” he told them. “He’s the prince’s friend from university. Fully vetted and authorised to be around His Highness.”</p><p>“Vetted and authorised!” Merlin spluttered, indignant that Leon had obviously been looking into him.</p><p>Leon gave him an apologetic look</p><p>“I’ll take care of him,” he told the other men. </p><p>“Leon,” said Merlin, interrupting him. “My mum is here, in the kitchen.”</p><p>With a curt nod, Leon turned to the men. “Did you pick up a woman? Her name should be Hunith Emrys. She’s safe, too. Can you please ensure she’s well-taken care of? I need to escort Mr Emrys to see Prince Arthur. He’ll be expecting him, no doubt.”</p><p>A brief, amused smile flickered across Leon’s lips.</p><p>“Come on,” he told Merlin. “This way.”</p><p>- - -</p><p>A knock on Arthur’s door startled him. He closed his laptop and called out, “Who is it?”</p><p>“Leon, sir.”</p><p>“Come in,” said Arthur, wondering why Leon had come to his room so early—and on Christmas morning, of all times. Not that it really mattered. He was up anyway. He hadn’t slept well last night, despite being tired, and as such, he’d been trying to catch up on the things he’d missed the past few days. The world wasn’t going to stop just because he had been sick. What he really needed was to relax somehow, but there was little chance of that being here with his father and with so many expectations heaped upon him that he felt as though he were drowning in them. His father might give him a brief reprieve from his duties for now, but he knew that it wouldn’t last.</p><p>The door opened and Leon slid inside.</p><p>“Merry Christmas, Your Highness. Please excuse me for waking you so early, but you have a guest—”</p><p>“A guest? Already!” said Arthur, cursing under his breath as he started to get out of bed. So much for a brief reprieve. “Can’t you send them away? I’m hardly dressed for visitors.”</p><p>He gestured to his striped pyjamas and ran a hand through his sleep ruffled hair.</p><p>“Oh, I rather think this guest won’t care about what clothes you’re wearing,” said Leon with a twinkle in his eye. “In fact, I do believe he rather likes you without any on at all.”</p><p>“Is he being a prat again?” came a voice from the hallway.</p><p>Arthur’s eyes widened with surprise. There was only one person in the entire world who had ever dared to call him a prat.</p><p>Leon laughed and pushed the door open, letting Merlin rush into the room. He threw his arms around Arthur and squeezed him tight, before letting him go and holding him at arm's length, looking him up at down as though checking him for damage.</p><p>Merlin pulled him into a hug again, nuzzling at his neck as he murmured against Arthur’s skin, “I’ve been so worried. I knew you weren’t taking care of yourself.”</p><p>Arthur harrumphed and hugged Merlin back. It wasn’t <i>his</i> fault that his father had made him go to the church. The fishing trip had been mandated by the king also.</p><p>“I’ll leave you two to it,” said Leon with a knowing nod. “I’ll make sure you’re not disturbed. And go easy on him, Merlin. He’s supposed to be resting.”</p><p>When Merlin released Arthur again, it was his turn to inspect Merlin. He frowned as he rubbed at one of the many splatters of mud on Merlin’s face. He was positively filthy—and not in the good way.</p><p>“Honestly, Merlin,” he said. “Why are you here? And what on earth have you been doing?”</p><p>“Trying to get in to see you!” replied Merlin indignantly. “Do you know what I’ve been through to get here? I had my <i>mum</i> drive me here through the night all the way from Wales. I changed a flat tyre in the middle of nowhere. Hiked half way across this estate. Slipped away from your security. All to see you. And what do I get for it? No ‘thanks Merlin, I’m so happy to see you!’, no ‘you came all this way to see me!’, not even a  ‘Merry Christmas’ — Merry Christmas, by the way—”</p><p>“Merlin,” said Arthur in his most commanding tone, placing a finger on his lips to quieten him. “Merlin.” He smiled with a strange fondness for his rambling, adorable, incensed boyfriend. Merlin came to a stop and looked at him strangely. “I’m glad to see you, Merlin.”</p><p>Merlin’s face burst into a sunny smile. “Oh God, me too,” he breathed. His eyes were shiny and his chin quivered a little. “You scared me half to death, you know. When you collapsed at the church, I—”</p><p>“Hey, hey,” said Arthur, grabbing his hand and placing it on his chest. “I’m here and I’m fine. It was just exhaustion. A bit of sleep and I’ll be right as rain.”</p><p>With a shaky sigh, Merlin nodded his head.</p><p>“And Merry Christmas to you too,” Arthur said, giving him a kiss. “Now, since you’ve come all this way, why don’t you get cleaned up and changed, and we’ll get a few more hours of sleep before Father’s speech and dinner.”</p><p>“Are you sure?” said Merlin hesitantly. “My mother is… downstairs, I think. Honestly, Arthur, this place is huge and I’ve lost all track of where I am. But she came with me and she’s here somewhere!”</p><p>“It’s fine. Leon will take care of her. Now, go shower and change, then stay for Christmas.”</p><p>“Are you sure?” said Merlin again.</p><p>“Absolutely. I insist. What kind of a prince would I be if I didn’t invite you to stay after you both traveled all night and crossed half the country to be here with me? Now, go.” </p><p>He pushed Merlin in the direction of the bathroom.</p><p>A short while later, he felt Merlin get into bed beside him, and Arthur’s heart gave a possessive throb as Merlin snuggled close, his hair damp and smelling of Arthur’s shampoo.</p><p>Merlin slipped his hand into Arthur’s, and with a huge yawn, tiredness engulfed him, and Arthur fell into a deep sleep.</p><p>- - -</p><p>Merlin stretched his arms and legs and let out a small groan as he started to wake. He opened his eyes and immediately squeezed them shut against the bright light coming in from the window. This definitely wasn’t his bedroom. Where was he?</p><p>Within a few moments, it all came back to him, and he sprang up to sitting. The large opulent room with extravagant interior, the huge, pristine bathroom… He was in Arthur’s room.</p><p>“Merlin…” moaned Arthur, tugging at his arm and pulling him back onto the bed. He looped an arm around Merlin’s waist and held him close.</p><p>“Morning,” Merlin replied.</p><p>“Mmm. What time is it?” Arthur asked, a scowl on his face. His eyes were still firmly closed.</p><p>“Too early, whatever it is.”</p><p>“Can’t be that late. George would wake me,” yawned Arthur, finally opening his eyes. </p><p>“You have a <i>servant</i> that comes and <i>wakes</i> you?” said Merlin with disbelief. “Actually, that explains a lot about your lack of morning lecture attendance.”</p><p>Arthur poked him in the ribs. “That is entirely <i>your</i> doing.”</p><p>Merlin grinned smugly at the memories of their mornings together back at Uni. “I make no apologies for that.”</p><p>They lay there together, enjoying being able to be close. Merlin was so thankful that he got to have this, and that he had realised, before it was too late, that he always wanted to have it.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” he said, breaking their silence.</p><p>Arthur’s forehead wrinkled with a confused frown. “What for?” </p><p>“For refusing to come here with you for Christmas,” said Merlin. “I should have come. If I had, then maybe none of this would have happened to you.”</p><p>“I got sick, Merlin. Not maimed or injured.”</p><p>“But you could have been,” said Merlin. “And the thought that it could have been something serious... That something serious still <i>could</i> happen and I wouldn’t be able to see you, that I’d have no right to be with you or mourn for you…”</p><p>“Merlin, I don’t know where all this is coming from, but I assure you, I don’t plan on dying any time soon.”</p><p>“I know that. But when you were in the hospital, I had no way of reaching out to find out how you were, and I had no right to know. No one would know who I was, or who we were to each other. I wasn’t sure that I wouldn’t be able to handle everything that comes with being with you. All the press, all the publicity, all the demands that we’d have on us. But I’ve realised though all of this that I don’t care about any of that. Because I care about you <i>more</i>. I guess what I’m saying is that I want to be with you, Arthur. No matter what. If you’ll have me, of course.”</p><p>Arthur smiled at him, one of his bright, joyful smiles that could light up the world, the kind that had endeared him in the eyes of the public. He pounced on Merlin with a kiss that took his breath away, and when they finally parted, Arthur said, “I knew you’d come around eventually. Maybe I should have accidents more often. Who knows what else you’ll give in on…”</p><p>“Don’t you dare!” said Merlin, wagging his finger at him threateningly.</p><p>“I suppose we ought to get up,” said Arthur. He flopped back on the bed, tired after having exerted himself. “I’ve no doubt George will be along soon.”</p><p>“Think you’d be up for a shower?” Merlin asked him, with a raised eyebrow. “I mean, do you think your doctors would allow it?” </p><p>He didn’t want to push things. But, well... it had been well over a week since they’d been together in person, and he’d already seen earlier that morning Arthur had a sizable shower… He couldn’t see how it would be a bad thing to have some fun together, so long as they didn’t overdo things. And Arthur would certainly be happier as he recovered. Merlin would make sure of that. </p><p>“I almost died and you’re after a wank in the shower. Unbelievable,” said Arthur dramatically with a wink. “Race you!”</p><p>“Hey!” called Merlin as Arthur bolted out of bed.</p><p>“What?” said Arthur over his shoulder. “I’m not a complete invalid.”</p><p>- - -</p><p>“How do I look?” asked Merlin, tugging at the neck of his cashmere sweater. </p><p>He felt uncomfortable and out of place wearing Arthur’s clothing, but there had been no other choice. </p><p>A few moments ago, he’d been squeaky clean, his body and magic humming with satisfaction and low-level contentment, what with their shower antics and knowing that he and Arthur were both in agreement about where their relationship was headed. </p><p>But now, all of that was slowly leaking away, being replaced with a creeping, lurking anxiety at what was to come. </p><p>He hitched up his trousers again. They were large around his waist, still a little loose even pulled tight with a belt. The shirt and jumper weren’t so bad, Arthur having sought out some that had been tight on him for ages, and there was only a shoe size between them, so that wasn’t awful either. But he wasn’t about to go to Christmas dinner with the King of England in his normal, dirty clothes. That was too much, even for someone who didn’t even really approve of there being a royal family.</p><p>“Awkward. But passable,” said Arthur. “Don’t worry; it’s just for one meal. I’ve already got George to get you some new clothes.”</p><p>“Arthur! It’s Christmas, give the poor man a day off! I can manage without new clothes for a day.”</p><p>Arthur stepped forward to straighten Merlin’s shirt collar and smooth down his hair, a smile curving on his lips. “And miss the chance to re-style you? Besides, as much as I enjoy you sans clothing, I don’t think my father would approve.”</p><p>“Oh God, I’m going to meet your father!” exclaimed Merlin with an air of despair.</p><p>“It will be fine,” said Arthur reassuringly.</p><p>“He’s the King of England, Arthur! I’m going to Christmas dinner with the King of England!”</p><p>“Yes, I’m aware of that,” Arthur replied dryly. “You’ve also been dating the Prince of Wales, in case you weren’t aware.”</p><p>He turned Merlin towards the door and gave him an encouraging push.</p><p>“But what if I use the wrong fork? Fuck. Will there be forks? How many forks? Oh, fuck. What if I say fuck?”</p><p>“Merlin, calm down. It’s just dinner. And it’s just my father. He’s not going to cut your head off. And just use whatever fork everyone else is using.”</p><p>Merlin took a deep breath. “Okay,” he said. </p><p>- - -</p><p>When they arrived at the dining hall, Merlin’s nerves were temporarily forgotten in a moment of shock. His and Arthur’s  parents were both there, sitting next to each other, talking and laughing animatedly as though they were old friends. Merlin’s mother was wearing a beautiful dress, and Merlin wondered idly where she’d got it from.</p><p>They looked up from their conversation as Merlin and Arthur approached.</p><p>“Ah, Arthur. We were wondering when you would be up. You’re just in time. Dinner will be served shortly.”</p><p>Morgana swanned into the room with her fiancé in tow. They took their seats at the table and Morgana turned her eyes on them both.</p><p>“So, Arthur, are you going to introduce us all to your… boyfriend?” she asked innocently.</p><p>“You knew?” complained Arthur.</p><p>“I’m your sister. Of course I knew.”</p><p>Arthur rolled his eyes before gesturing towards Merlin with a small smile. “Morgana, Gwaine. Father. This is Merlin. My <i>boyfriend</i>,” he said. Then he pulled a face at Morgana.</p><p>Morgana stuck her tongue out at him.</p><p>“Now, now, you two,” said the king with a stern look. “We have guests.”</p><p>Both Arthur and Morgana instantly quietened down and behaved themselves.</p><p>Uther gestured for Merlin and Arthur to take their seats at the table before he rose from his own seat at the head of it.</p><p>“Today,” he began, “our family circle gets a little bigger, as Merlin and the lovely Hunith here join us for the first of what I hope will be many family Christmasses. I know that we are not the most conventional of families, but I hope that you will find ways to make yourselves at home during your stay with us.” </p><p>He leaned closer to Merlin and said softly, “And Merlin, should you ever hurt my son, there’s still an executioner’s block in the White Tower...”</p><p>“Father!” exclaimed Arthur and Morgana in unison.</p><p>Gwaine just winked at Merlin. “Don’t worry,” he said. “He told me the same thing, and yet, here I am! Head still on my shoulders.”</p><p>Merlin laughed nervously.</p><p>“So, let us all raise our glasses and have a toast to a Merry Christmas and a New Year full of health and happiness.”</p><p>They all toasted and took sips of their wine. The serving staff took their cue and started to bring in the food.</p><p>Merlin looked around him, wondering just quite how he had gone from plans of spending Christmas at home with his mum in their rundown but well-loved cottage in Wales, to this: a lavish dining hall, decorated within an inch of its life for the Christmas season, with golden chandeliers and fittings and countless other priceless antiques, eating Christmas dinner with his mum, a king, a prince and a princess. </p><p>“Hunith,” Merlin heard Uther say. “You must tell me more about Calennig. It sounds delightful. Similar to Hogmanay.”</p><p>“You should invite me,” said Arthur quietly. “Now that Father knows.”</p><p>“What?” said Merlin, having been lost in his thoughts.</p><p>“You should invite me to spend Calennig with you.”</p><p>Merlin frowned in confusion. “Won’t your father want you here?” </p><p>“Father will understand that this might be the only chance we have to do it. It’s your birthday, too. He’ll let me go. Well, go on then.”</p><p>“Er, all right. Want to come to mine for New Years?”</p><p>“I don’t know. Let me think about it…”</p><p>Merlin glowered at him and then laughed. Outside, the snow was still falling, and inside a fire burned in the fireplace as merrily as the conversation. Good food and wine was flowing freely, and he couldn’t help but be happy in the knowledge that this pompous, kind, ridiculous man was his, for better or worse, and they were both willing to make things work.</p><p>- - -</p><p>Arthur stirred as Merlin sat down next to him on the bed. He smiled sleepily and pulled himself up to sitting. Merlin grinned at him, reaching out to cup his face and draw him in. He pressed his forehead against Arthur’s, rubbing their noses together before tilting his head and moving in for a slow, passionate kiss. He shifted as they kissed to straddle Arthur’s lap, rubbing his  thumbs softly over Arthur’s cheekbones. If someone had told Arthur a few years ago that he would feel so loved and accepted and <i>comfortable</i> in his own skin, he wouldn’t have believed them. Being able to be openly himself had seemed like a pipedream, something he would long for but never achieve, and yet here he was.</p><p>He smiled into their kiss as the cold metal of Merlin’s ring pressed against his cheek for the first time, reminding him how proud and emotional he’d been seeing Merlin walking up the aisle to him less than twenty-four hours ago.</p><p>If it weren’t for the weight of Merlin heavy on his legs, and his tongue doing rather fantastic things in Arthur’s mouth, Arthur would have pinched himself to make sure it wasn’t all a dream. </p><p>They had been through so much together over the past year. After their second Christmas together, Arthur had come out publicly, with the help and support of his father and the palace. At the same time, they had made the official announcement of HRH Arthur William Louis de Bois-Pendragon, Prince of Wales’ engagement to Mister Merlin Emrys. And then the backlash hit. Fortunately, they had all been prepared for it, so they had been sheltered from the most vile parts. Arthur had caught Merlin once reading the comments on an article on the internet. Some people were awful. That said, most of the people they’d encountered had been amazingly supportive of them and that had been comforting. </p><p>“Shh, it’s our first day married. Stop thinking, clotpole,” Merlin murmured against his lips. “I want all of my husband's attention.”</p><p>Arthur laughed and kissed him again. “Husband. I like that,” he said with satisfaction.</p><p>“Me, too,” said Merlin. “I’m glad we snuck away last night.”</p><p>“Mmm, yes,” agreed Arthur, remembering all the fun they’d had together before they’d fallen asleep, exhausted and spent, after slipping away from their own wedding reception.</p><p>Merlin slid his hands under the waistband of Arthur’s boxer shorts, stroking the skin there with teasing, fleeting touches that had Arthur shivering with anticipation. </p><p>“Fancy a repeat?” he asked.</p><p>Arthur didn’t bother with a reply. He merely dove in and helped Merlin to remove his t-shirt, taking pleasure in seeing Merlin’s smooth, pale skin that begged to be marked somehow. He scratched his fingernails lightly across Merlin’s shoulders, leaving faint red lines across them. They would be gone shortly, but that didn’t take away from Arthur’s satisfaction. They had to be careful as to when and how they marked each other; they’d made the mistake once of giving each other lovebites the day before attending a film premiere, the press—and the internet—had gone wild.</p><p>It was a strange thing, knowing that there were people out there who speculated on their love lives, for a while it had made Arthur a bit self-conscious. Growing up in the spotlight brought with it sky-high expectations and a lot of shame, which had been compounded by having to keep their relationship under wraps when they were at university. Arthur hadn’t had any hang ups about being gay; that was just who he was. But he had had hang ups about what people would do and say once they found out. Merlin had helped him through it, though. And he’d come through it all, all the stronger for it.</p><p>He couldn’t stop people from talking about them, so he’d come to the conclusion that they could speculate all they liked. It didn’t mean anything. They were the only ones who knew the truth about their relationship. Sometimes, though, when they were trying something new, or something that he thought others might be surprised about, he got embarrassed all over again. </p><p>Now was not one of those times however, with Merlin warm, familiar and solid in his lap. He slipped his hands around Merlin’s waist and down the back of his boxers to cup his arse and bring him closer. Merlin hummed and lifted himself onto his knees. Arthur pushed off his underwear and helped him out of them. He shoved his own down and shimmied out of them, as Merlin returned the favour and discarded them, before he settled down in Arthur’s lap again.</p><p>Merlin ran his fingers through Arthur’s hair, tugging lightly to tilt Arthur’s head back. He straddled Arthur’s thighs and wrapped his fingers around his cock as he captured his lips with a kiss. Arthur groaned into it. The stress and worries of the past few days melted away as he let his body respond to Merlin’s touch. He flipped Merlin over onto the bed, pressing him into the mattress as they continued to kiss. He grasped both Merlin’s wrists and pinned them above his head, keeping them there as he attacked Merlin’s neck and collarbone before pressing kisses down his sternum. It thrilled him to know that Merlin was his <i>husband</i> now. They had consummated the marriage last night, but it had been a hurried affair, both of them too exhausted to last for long. Arthur wanted to make this moment, their first morning as a married couple, last. </p><p>Merlin squirmed under his touch, shivering and arching up beneath him. Arthur used his weight to keep Merlin pressed against the bed as he zeroed in on Merlin’s nipples, one of his most sensitive spots. Arthur intended to draw out all those delicious sounds that Merlin made; from breathy sighs to whines that came unbidden from the back of his throat, Arthur loved and relished every single one of them. As he sucked lightly, Merlin groaned. Scraping his teeth over the nub earned him a bitten-off whine, and pinching Merlin’s other nipple with his fingers elicited a shudder and a small cry. </p><p>“Ah, Arthur! Arthur, please—”</p><p>Finally, relenting, Arthur pulled away. He slid his hand into Merlin’s hair, letting the silky soft strands slip through his fingers as Merlin tugged him down to kiss him, his tongue tracing the inside of Arthur’s mouth. They contented themselves with kissing as they slowly rocked against each other, sensations and feelings building. When they parted, breathless, Arthur pressed his forehead against Merlin’s, staring into his eyes as he caught his breath. He let his fingers trace their way down Merlin’s chest, circling them around his belly button, making Merlin chuckle.</p><p>“I love you,” he told Arthur.</p><p>“Not as much as I love you,” Arthur replied, believing this firmly with all his heart. At that moment, he was overflowing with love for the man who had chosen him, who had accepted him and all that he came with, and was willing to face the world with him. He could never repay what Merlin had given him, even if he lived to be hundreds, or even thousands, of years old.</p><p>Merlin laughed again, a delightful, joyful sound that Arthur treasured as much as all the others. He moved backwards making his way down Merlin’s body, kissing and nuzzling at his belly before moving along to the soft skin of his inner thighs. He nibbled there, rubbing his hands fleetingly around Merlin’s cock in a tease that he knew was sure to set Merlin on edge. His hips bucked and Arthur held them down, kissing and licking at the v of his hips. Merlin pushed against him as he gasped and his hand found Arthur’s head where he yanked at Arthur’s hair. </p><p>“Fuck, Arthur. If you don’t— Ah— If you don’t do something— Please—”</p><p>With a grin, Arthur lightly ran his nose along the straining length of Merlin’s cock, knowing it would drive him mad. Sure enough, Merlin choked and tightened his grip on Arthur’s hair, making his scalp smart.  </p><p>“Oh, God. Arthur, please, <i>please</i>...”</p><p>Arthur obliged him with a tiny lick at the head of his cock.</p><p>Merlin’s whine was music to Arthur’s ears. He repeated the motion, licking again, and Merlin’s cock gave a throb as he tried to push up towards Arthur’s mouth.</p><p>Merlin used more force with his hand, steering Arthur’s head closer to his cock. Arthur opened his mouth and let Merlin guide his length past his lips, into his mouth. Then he wrapped his lips around the head of Merlin’s cock and gave a long, firm suck.</p><p>“Oh yeah,” hissed Merlin. “That’s it.”</p><p>Warmth curled in Arthur’s belly. Though they’d never discussed it, he knew that Merlin was aware of what praise did to him. He received so little of it from the people that actually knew him, and certainly he had lacked it growing up. When Merlin praised him, he knew that he’d earned it. He bobbed his head, pressing his tongue along the underside of Merlin’s cock as he continued to work with a steadfast determination, intent on sucking Merlin’s brains out through his cock. </p><p>“Shit,” continued Merlin, his fingers gripping Arthur’s hair so hard that it hurt. He pushed up with his hips trying to get deeper into Arthur’s mouth. Arthur obliged him, taking him deeper until his nose was pressing against dark curls, inhaling that intoxicating scent that was so uniquely Merlin.</p><p>He pulled off to mouth at Merlin’s balls, gently sucking one into his mouth. Merlin’s breathing got heavier, the fingers of his free hand curling in the bedsheets. Arthur smiled with satisfaction. He traced a finger questioningly behind Merlin’s balls and along his taint, and Merlin spread his legs wider with a groan.</p><p>“Turn over,” Arthur told him as he pulled away, helping Merlin twist around and onto his hands and knees.</p><p>Arthur pressed soft kisses along Merlin’s spine, each one a gentle declaration of his love. He let his fingers run over Merlin’s ribs and flanks, relishing every inch of smooth, supple skin that Merlin shared with him. His hands skimmed over Merlin’s hips until he reached his arse, which Arthur cupped with a smile. </p><p>Merlin laughed and wiggled his behind at him. “Go on then,” he told him.</p><p>Arthur pressed a kiss at a cheek and bit it lightly before parting them and licking a single stripe over Merlin’s hole, then he sat back for a moment to watch with fascination the way that Merlin’s hole fluttered and clenched at the sensation.</p><p>“Arthur!” Merlin whined, glancing around at him with annoyance. </p><p>“Impatient, are we?” Arthur teased.</p><p>He didn’t wait for Merlin’s reply as he leaned in and licked again, slowly tracing the rim of Merlin’s hole with his tongue. He remembered how wrong it had seemed the first time he and Merlin had attempted this, how he couldn’t imagine how the act—either giving or receiving—could possibly be pleasurable. How wrong he’d been. He loved driving Merlin wild, and Merlin was a connoisseur, talented at bringing him to the edge within a few minutes when their roles were reversed.</p><p>Arthur pushed his tongue past Merlin’s rim, stabbing in and in, adding a finger to the mix as he worked to loosen Merlin’s hole. Merlin mewled and clawed at the sheets, biting back noises.</p><p>Pulling away for a moment, Arthur said, “Let me hear you.”</p><p>As he returned to his efforts, he wrapped his hand around Merlin’s cock, pumping slowly as Merlin let bitten off curses and whimpers fall from his lips. </p><p>When Arthur pulled away finally, his tongue and jaw aching from his efforts, he wiped his face with the back of his hand and rewarded himself by giving his own neglected cock a stroke. He closed his eyes and groaned before placing his other hand on Merlin’s back.</p><p>“Do we have any—?” he asked, as Merlin turned and pressed a tube of lube into his hand. </p><p>Arthur chuckled. “You’re eager this morning.”</p><p>Merlin winked at him. “Raring to go, Your Highness.”</p><p>The way Merlin’s deep voice curved around the use of his title, mockingly, yet lovingly, made Arthur’s cock throb. </p><p>He flicked open the lube and slicked his own length, before dribbling some down between Merlin’s cheeks. Then he swiped his fingers through the mess and pushed one, then two into Merlin’s hole with ease, checking if he was ready. He grinned and bit his lip as he crooked his fingers, searching for that special spot inside. </p><p>Merlin’s body jerked as he gave a small cry, which deepened to a moan as Arthur massaged there. Merlin let his head hang between his shoulders, his eyes closed. Arthur knew that he was close from the growing static in the air that was making his hair stand on end. He reached around Merlin, grasping his cock, stroking it a few times before squeezing at the base as Merlin’s cock jerked.</p><p>“Oh, fuck you,” groaned Merlin, as Arthur held him firmly and continued to massage. “Shit. Arthur, Arthur—”</p><p>Merlin’s cock pulsed, but Arthur held a tight ring around the base of it. </p><p>“I hate you,” Merlin gasped. </p><p>Arthur leaned over him, pressing a kiss to his hair. “No, you don’t,” he told him, as he guided his cock to Merlin’s hole and then slowly, slowly pushed in. Merlin’s back arched as slid all the way in with a smooth motion, letting out a long, breathy moan.</p><p>“Oh yeah,” he murmured, his face blissful.</p><p>“Told you,” said Arthur, tracing the shell of Merlin’s ear to elicit a delicious full-body shudder and another pulse of his cock. </p><p>He took a few slow thrusts, enjoying Merlin’s reaction before he began to feel rather desperate himself. He started to rock into Merlin with an increasing pace, before he released his grip on Merlin’s cock to grasp him by the hips and drive into him, deeper and faster. Merlin’s gasps and groans were punched out of him with Arthur’s increasingly staccato thrusts. Merlin reached for his own cock. It didn’t take long before he came with Arthur’s name on his lips.</p><p>Arthur groaned himself as Merlin’s hole tightened and fluttered around his cock, bringing him over the edge as he throbbed out his release. </p><p>He pressed himself against Merlin’s back, both of them breathless and floating gloriously on their joint high. Arthur held Merlin close and rolled them over to one side, grimacing a little as he slid out. Still, he found himself smiling and kissed the back of Merlin’s neck and running his fingers through his hair. Merlin hummed happily. He shifted to turn to face him and gave him a kiss as he snuggled into Arthur’s arms.</p><p>“Don’t get too comfy,” Arthur reminded him. “We have to get to the airport in a few hours.”</p><p>Merlin groaned as though unable to believe Arthur was already turning his thoughts to their impending honeymoon. “Don’t remind me,” he said. “Can’t we send a decoy for the press and just stay here the entire time, just you and me and plenty of sex?”</p><p>“I’d rather have you, sun, sand and plenty of sex. The island is gorgeous. You’ll love it. No paps. No anyone, really. At least, not on our side.”</p><p>“No one else?” Merlin perked up, his mouth hinting at a mischievous grin. “That does sound nice.” </p><p>“Your mind is so filthy,” Arthur chided with a yawn, even as his eyes drooped.</p><p>Merlin poked him in the side. “You love it, and whatever happened to not getting comfy?”</p><p>Arthur huffed. “Let Leon wake us.”</p><p>“He’ll demand a raise again,” Merlin told him, tugging the covers over them</p><p>“He can have it.”</p><p>“Love you,” mumbled Merlin, sleepily.</p><p>“Mmm, you too, Mister Pendragon.”</p><p>Merlin’s eyes flew open. “I haven’t agreed to that yet!”</p><p>Arthur laughed, thinking of the monogrammed ‘MP’ items that had already been added to their home. “You will. ” He grinned, bringing Merlin’s hand to his mouth and kissing his wedding band. “You will.”</p>
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